La Vida De Mia

A reminder of Pablo Neruda

2010-10-11T22:59:00.002+08:00

When I came back from church at night, Cookie started crying. I took her out from her cot and gave her some fever medicine as she was feverish for the past 2 days. After the medicine, she pointed to her room and told me she want to go to sleep. I told her to wait for me - for Mummy to clean her teeth and wash face and then get ready to bring Cookie to her room. After i did all that, she crawled onto my bed and stared at the ceiling. I asked her gently if she wanted to go to her own room. She said no. So she snuggled up to me, held my hand with our hands on her chest while I read "Bringing up Boys" by Dr James Dobson.... (hahahaha - should it have been Bringing up Girls?).

I thought she may not be able to sleep as this was the first time I had brought her to bed (and with the reading light on too). But she was shielded from the light with a pillow and soon after fell asleep. WHat a pleasure to be able to hold my daughter's hand and feel her heartbeat while she drifted off to sleep! Reminded me of a poem by Pablo Neruda (he was born in Chile and studied in Santiago in his twenties - so fitting for me since my husband is now in Santiago) ....

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way

than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.

It is so wonderful to be a mother...! I am indeed blessed.

CFP - easy or hard

2010-05-30T21:48:00.003+08:00

I am in the midst of doing my CFP Certification Course (Certified Financial Planner) and I found it rather difficult. I was wondering why everyone I met who has already done it said that it was easy. Why did I find it difficult then? Was I getting stupid?

After a few diggings, I realised that those who did it a long time ago.. did not have to sit thru an exam.. they just took the question home and then the next day went to the exam hall to start writing what they had the whole night to prepare. And in those days to get exemptions was easy too.

For my own exemption so that I neednt do the 7 papers but 2, I had to get 2 letters from both my former employer as well as current employer that detailed that I had the relevant experience dealing with some degree of money management (budgetting, etc) before they let me have the exemption to do the Challenge Status. The MBA that I had was not enough at all.

It seems that the Financial Planning Association of Malaysia is trying to increase the standard of the CFP trademark holders. So there is a rather rigorous testing of our ability to produce a financial plan in a mere 3 hours. A normal financial plan takes ages to complete especially if you do not have software to help you. And there is also 6 other exams other than the financial plan one (thankfully I only need to do 2 papers out of the 7). When I first read the questions of the various modules, I realised that I could not answer any of the questions as they involved a deeper knowledge of insurance, investment, tax, retirement and estate planning.

The fact remains that it is no longer "no one fails" like in the old days. Now, easily 20% or more do fail the papers. That is indeed scarier than doing my MBA... because that thought of failing never crossed my mind then.

My final exams is coming and by June 19th I will either be done or done for~!..... it has been a very interesting process and planning my own financial plan is I suppose the best thing that can come out of this! Here's to financial freedom when we want it!

Potty Training Step 2

2010-04-22T13:56:00.002+08:00

I decided to try potty training seriously when I am in Australia in April for my MIL's 70th birthday celebration. 10 days of staying 24 7 with the kids should be helpful in promoting this training.

It was surprisingly easy. Altho many times they just want to go to the toilet to sit on the bowl for fun, it's ok as long as sometimes they get it right. Now the girls can tell me if they are going to do a shi shi potty and will tug at my baju if they want to do so. Somehow they are still now so good in the poo department but since they are not yet 2, it is still alright with me.

They are still in diapers when they go downstairs to the park as I dun want any mishap and during their sleeping time but i think its great progress.

Books for Toddlers

2010-04-22T13:27:00.002+08:00

These books are supposed to be suitable for Toddlers from 2-3 years old.

Book to a Goose by Mem Foz and David Miller
Click, Clack 123 by Doreen Cronin and Betsy Lewin
Cuddle Time by Libby Gleeson
Dig, Dig, Digging by Margaret Mayo & Alex Ayliffe
Dog in, Cat out by Gillian Rubinstein
Each Peach Pear Plum by Janet and Allan Ahlberg
Good Night, Me by Andrew Daddo & Emma Quay
Grandpa & Thomas by Pamela Allen
Guess How Much I love you by Sam McBratney
I want my Potty by Tony Ross
My Dad by Anthony Browne
My Grandma by Jeanette Rowe
Piglet & Mama by Margaret Wild & Stephen Michael King
The Grandpa Book by Todd Parr
The Very Hungry Caterpillar by Eric Carle
Too Many Pears by Jackie French & Bruce Whatley
We're Going on a Bear Hunt by Michael Rosen & Helen Oxenbury
Wheels on the Bus by Penny Dann
Za-za's Baby Brother by Lucy Cousins

A quick check on mphonline showed that they only had The Very Hungry Caterpillar whilst some of other books may be on their database but listed as not available. This is sad indeed if we want to promote reading for the kids. I suppose they may have other books but sometimes the books that parents deem interesting are tossed out by the kids. I shall have to look elsewhere to procure my books.

Books for Babies

2010-04-22T12:57:00.003+08:00

I read a list from thebigbookclub.com.au about what is suitable for babies from birth till 2 and I must say that my kids did like some of the books that I managed to get for them.

Dear Zoo by Rod Campbell - its a very funny book which highlight animals in the zoo.
Eyes, Nose, Fingers & Toes by Judy Hindley
Families by Odette Ross
Hippo Has A Hat by Julia Donaldson - My kids just love seeing the leopard in a skirt and hippo wearing a hat, caterpillar with shoes...
Hug by Jex Alborough
I Went Walking by Sue Machin & Julie Vivas
Kipper's Book of Colours by Mick Inkpen
Let's Go Visiting by Sue Williams & Julie Vivas
Maisy's Bathtime by Lucy Cousins
Miffy Series by Dick Bruna
Moonlight by Jan Ormerod
Nursery Rhymes by Deb Gliori - did not get this but something similar which they love too
Peepo! by Janet an Allan Ahlberg
Round & Round the Garden by Ian Beck & Sarah Williams
Spot (any spot books) by Eric Hill - all spot book are most welcomed
Teddy Bear Hide and Seek by Pamela Edwards - this was their favourite book when they were very very young
Where is the Green Sheep? by Mem Fox and Judy Horacek - they ate this up literally!

But they are now almost 2 and therefore needs to graduate to another set of books. Shall update another batch soon.

Potty Training

2010-02-22T23:10:00.003+08:00

I decided a few days ago from watching my girls respond to requests that its time to potty train them. So today, when they are almost 22 months old, I decided to start the potty training. I have yet to read much about it but when I took Eggy to the potty this evening, I was rewarded with a pee!! Both her papa and I burst out in spontaneous claps and smiles. Eggy was grinning so happily.

Cookie tried to pee too but nothing came out... but I cannot fault her enthusiasm.

Will see how long this will take. I am glad that it was not as hard as i thought it would be since i have heard some stories from frens about how hard that was going to be.

A Visit to the Vet

2009-12-12T16:44:00.003+08:00

Dr Merv had been Nimz' vet for quite a while now. Just on Friday I brought Nimz to see him for his annual vaccination and deworming trip to see Dr Merv. I washed Nimz just an hour before and hairdryed him (after the vaccination, you were not supposed to bathe the cat for about a week).

Dr Merv recognised Nimz straightaway and took out his file (which in under his name) with my name as his owner.. altho i do think that I am more like his slave than owner. NImz is brought into the cat room where Dr Merv would start the procedure by taking him out of his cage gently and mumbling soothing words to him and even smelling his fur to see if he had a good or bad odour. He then tickled his chin and told him "You are such a good boy! Come, let me see your eyes". He looked into the crystal ball like eyes and pronounced that NImz looked perfectly healthy via the eyes, then he touches his nose to see if its slightly wet. He also used his fingers to feel Nimz all over the body to check for any unusual lump or inflammation. He took his temperature (of course via his 'behind' and talked to Nimz cheerily all the time while the thermometer was in his bum. Clearly Nimz was quite upset and moved his tail violently. Lastly he checked his ears, and sniffed at his mouth.

Dr Merv always cleans Nimz's ears by putting some ear drops into his ears and then for the next minute of so, Nimz would resemble and an Ewok with flattened ears.. damn hilarious sight for those whose cats always have erect ears! Dr Merv advised me to clean his teeth with gauze and cat mouth wash to help with his gingivitis. "Gingivitis would shortened the cat's life span by 20%... oh dear.. Nimz, you did not hear this" he lowered his voice as Nimz gave a whimper.

After the procedure, I got a tour of his latest acquisition of a cat which had been run over by a car. The hinds legs were crushed and the cat was almost put to sleep due to him being injured quite badly. However, the cat showed such resilience that Dr Merv amputated his legs and now when i looked at Gump.. he had the appearance of a normal cat sitting down on his haunches but when he walked towards me, only his front legs moved while his back was sliding over the floor. He was such a lovwly looking cat, with bright green eyes and a narrow sweet face. Such a lovely disposition too. My heart melted as i tickled him. The amazing thing about Gump, well he probably does not realise that his legs are missing and just carried on living with his new situation. No grumbling. just a cheery meow when you come over to say a few words to him.

Weddings

2009-11-26T23:47:00.003+08:00

A few friends gathered over a sumptuous Japanese dinner at Iketeru, Hilton. The reason for the dinner was to kind of have a hen's night for the bride to be.. altho i have to say that the hen's night was a bit too tame...;) Maybe its becos we all have hit the middle age line this year and hence not too keen to do anymore of the 'fun' stuff.

It brings to mind my own wedding 6 years ago at The Mines Beach Resort. It seems such an ethereal time. With the white frothy wedding gown dotted with blue flowers (i had always wanted some blue on my wedding gown), bouncy curls on the head, a gathering of beloved friends and family... it was such a special moment. I think it was very special because I made my vows to God in front of the people whom I cared about (altho I no longer speak to half of the guest invited due to one reason or another). It really was such a sacred moment. To walk down the aisle towards the man that you love and whom you know reciprocate that 'verb' towards you. To forever be joined in spirit with this one person who also pledged to walk the journey with you. It was such a comfort, a homecoming of sorts... this wedding which is the start of a marriage. What a wonder it was.. these moments which i like to think about as it brings a smile to my face.

Here's to you my friend who is going to begin this new journey together with her man. Its downright scary but heck! I'll cheer you on!

Eggy names her pink Elephant from Laos

2009-11-25T22:47:00.003+08:00

Its been so long since I last wrote and heaps of things have been happening to the kids and to me too. But today, i particularly wanted to write about Eggy and her pink elephant which Uncle Sargeant from Laos got for her (Cookie got a yellow elephant). We were playing with the elephant in her cot with her throwing it out of the cot ever so often and me putting it back in there.. it's great fun for her!

A bit of some development speech (i now understand why mothers get so excited with their kids speaking.. from a only crying mass to a distinctly articulating mobile cave-kid.. its really like celebrating a crippled person walk again in a lesser degree). Anyway, Eggy can call me Mama or Mummy, point at Cookie, Kaka and Nimbus... but today, she pointed at the elephant and said "Mimi" and again "Mimi". I was wondering why.. cos i kept calling the elephant "Pinky".

It seems that Eggy is developing quicker in her speech than Cookie... She has also a repertoire of susu, tidur, butfly (butterfly), frawer (flower), frog (which she like to call mama as well) Aunt rene is really teaching her some nonsense..*grin* So far, no chinese words yet..

Also funnily, everytime we say "Papa", she would turn up her palm and shake it as tho to say that he is not around.. in many cases, he is not around. Marido is missing all the fun! Poor chap.

Beef Curry and Pork Bacon

2009-10-06T12:23:00.002+08:00

In a hotel restaurant in the heart of Kuala Lumpur, a couple on holidays was scanning the breakfast menu. "Here darling.. bacon and eggs are on no 4"... said the wife.

"Ho ho.. bacon.. yummy.. er but why is it beef bacon?" wondered the husband. "Waiter... can I get some pork bacon instead?"

The waiter looked a bit flustered "Sir, this is a halal restaurant.. we don't serve pork."

"Oh I see.." The man replied but clearly from his facial expression, he did not understand the situation at all. When the beef bacon arrived, and the man was trying to bite into the stringy piece of meet, he grumbled "What type of restaurant is this that does not serve pork!!?"

Later in the night, they were seated in a lovely Indian restaurant with pictures of Shah Rukh Khan and other Bollywood actors (which incidentally held no meaning for them although they loved Indian food). "Where is the beef curry?" demanded the husband to the waiter.

The waiter must have rolled his eyes under his closed lids before opening them and stiffly said "Sir, we don't serve beef in this establishment" God forbid.. cows are sacred in our culture!

"But but" sputtered the man indignantly "we have beef curry in Indian restaurants in our country!" The waiter patiently said "That may be true Sir but here, we don't serve beef on our menu" .. "May I suggest a Chicken Vindaloo instead?"

A fren is preggie!

2009-10-02T12:49:00.000+08:00

No more being a cow

2009-09-28T15:38:00.002+08:00

It has been like 3 weeks since i stopped breastfeeding. I thought that i would miss it but actually i did not really suffer much after effects.. perhaps a tad sad cos of the hormones are not released as much to make one happy but the freedom enjoyed certainly makes up for it. at least now i can disappear from the kids for more than 4 hours.. that certainly helps with work (meeting clients) and of course, my work has picked up a lot more now.

So, officially I stopped breastfeeding in Sept 2009... which means that I actually breastfed for 16 months... i am amazed that i actually did it. to think that I did not sleep straight for more than 4 hours at night for one whole year due to the breastfeeding is like psychotic... looking back, i believe that God must have given me a steely edge to my determination. I wonder if i can do this all over again.. God help me!!

The kids are adjusting well to their Mama not feeding them anymore.. they have had the bottle for a long time and so the total switch was accepted with no fuss... In fact, after stopping the breastfeeding, Eggy's weight has slightly improved.. she was a tad skinny for her age.. in fact, below average. We shall see what the doctor says the next round.

I think i can be a lactation consultant... jajajaja.. but i noticed that many women arent interested to breastfeed. Mostly never even make the 2 months mark. Some just go straight to formula.. dunno..whether its lack of education or the pressure of working. But working... in the 2 months maternity.. no work, right?

just for you and this is not a forwarded message!

2009-09-14T08:36:00.001+08:00

it's not the myriad emotions that makes me long for you
its the quiet smile on your face
the warm glint in your eye
the laugh lines around your mouth
the little marks that make you you

it's the distance that separates us
the hurriedness of our conversations
the difference in time zones
the many events that distract us

It's the promise of a cosy silent evening
holding the hands of our children together
ruffling Nimbus and snatching him from each other
staring across to the hills and feeling the wind

So many things... so little time
how can one be bored?
how can one be a skeptic?
how can one be blind?

We love becos
we choose to love
So i say that i love you
by the things that i do

Both of you

2009-09-09T15:54:00.003+08:00

I thought i'd like to have one of you...
But instead i got the both of you
you were something i wanted to have so that i would not regret not ever having
and when you two arrived ... regret came as well...
not becos there were 2 but becos i sud have asked for you much earlier

when i am with you...
i feel a tiny warmth infuse my soul and and it threatens to make me laugh out loud
and i do... becos you infect me with your happiness
when i am not with you...
i keep seeing your little faces on the dark canvas in my mind
funny faces, sad faces, adorable faces
runny noses, tearing eyes and drooling mouths
so disgusting but how i love the smellyness and the unique scent of you
In the quiet of my room when your brother is sitting next to me on the bed
with my hand stroking his brown head, my other imaginary hand is stroking your heads in the next room where you are

it's just splendid, magical and mysterious..
the way i love you
i've been given a gift, precious beyond belief..
thank you for giving me the privilege of loving you.

Bubs at 16 mths

2009-09-09T14:36:00.004+08:00

Loving sisters

Eggy laughing

Small cookie in her big pram

twins' great pose

Eggy

Cookie loves to read

Time to move on

2009-08-26T22:21:00.001+08:00

I think sometimes we outgrow something we hold dear for far too long and so today... is the start of doing what Alex likes to tell me "Move on".

Stopping the milk

2009-08-26T22:20:00.001+08:00

It has been about 16 months of breastfeeding and it is time to give it up.

Busy? - so what else is new?

2009-08-10T12:48:00.005+08:00

Yeah.. as the title suggests, i am busy but so is everyone else? But let me just share with you what my busy means at this point of time.

I have been staying in Brisbane and Gold Coast the last 2 weeks in a 2 bedroom apartment. The one in Brisbane is the Oaks Festival Tower (The Oaks are everywhere in Brisbane!) near to Queen Street malls and other amennities like the library (which I love as it is baby/kids friendly) and Woolies or Coles which I cannot live without ;). The day starts off at 7.30am with either one kid howling or both of them placidly playing in their cots. Then, it's a whirlwind of feeding, bathing, more feeding and cooking and yet more feeding and cleaning the mess they make due to their inability to eat like an adult. Honestly, after eating, my kids have food all over their heads cos their will take the food out of the mouth, look at it with deep interest and with a happy squeal slap it on their heads. Garrr! One of my friends told me that everytime her son has some bits of food at the corner of his mouth, her mother in law would jump up and wipe it away.. I can just imagine her having a fit if she sees my children. I dont have a baby high chair here too and feeding kids without strapping them down is terribly irritating. I dont know how mothers run around chasing their kids for food. At least for me, my kids walk up to me and open their mouths. Phew!

Sometimes in the midst of taking care of the kids and preparing them for outings, i forget to eat.. but no worries.. i am not losing weight at all. That is because i get good sleep cos the kids are down for 12 hours in the night... all that training works!

Then, in the afternoon.. it starts all over again. But in between, i managed to read 2 books in that week (Life with Jeeves by P.G. Wodehouse - darn farnee but after one book, i have had enough of that idiot, bumbling Bertie and his all too clever butler Jeeves. Kafka on the Shore by Haruki Murakami - also after one book, i think i shall give the rest of his books a miss... it's good writing and completely unputdownable but I find the bizarreness of spirits taking over one's body to murder people, fish falling from the sky and people fainting but yet having their eyes open and moving to the left and right... a bit too much for me. I have just got to read.. it keeps me sane somewhat. in between, I managed brisk walks along the incredibly lovely burleigh beach.

The kids are so adorable (to me only lah) and i think that perhaps they need to be adorable and funny so that the exasperated parents dun kill them off. I think the secret to calm parenting is to be just that.. calm.. in the face of whatever that happens.. like Cookie cracking her head on the edge of the glass table when she fell on it, Eggy smiling at her grandmother with a mouthful of zinc oxide, Cookie and Eggy dipping their fingers in the Bottom Butter and licking them.. it smells really good! Eggy walking into the wet bathroom and falling like she slipped on a banana peel, Cookie dangling my new Iphone out the 11th floor railing on the balcony, Cookie grabbing Eggy's fuzz on the head and looking at me as though she has done something incredibly crever while Eggy is bawling away, Cookie eating a bar of soap that she managed to open from its plastic packaging, Eggy upsetting a bowl of soft boiled eggs and soiling the hotel carpet and our clothes, both of them eating bananas and stomping them on the carpet when they feel like it. Or better still, Cookie discovering the soiled diapers and opening it up and smearing the delicious poo on her hands and clothes and then passing it to Eggy - really should have taken a photo of this!

Father's Day 2009

2009-06-22T11:32:00.004+08:00

This year's Father's Day was just about the same as the rest of the years.. we go out to dinner. However this year, it was very merry with 4 grandchildren and 2 children with their husbands and the father and mother.

Just want to wish Pa "Happy Father's Day!" Here a photo of Pa with me and the kiddos.

Does not my Pa look happy? That's smum next to him!

A monologue for an audition

2009-04-19T20:42:00.003+08:00

I had this big Siamese cat named Nimbus, who came and went as he pleased. One day he went out and didn't come back. Days went by, and I went up and down the corridors of the apartment, calling, "Nimbus, Nimbus!" I put up signs and knocked on doors and stopped my neighbours,--"Have you seen a big Siamese cat?"

I was very very sad all the time—oh how l loved this cat! He was cuddly and loved to be cuddled. He followed me around like a shadow as if he was a dog. He was hardly silent, he chatted to me during the day, waked me up in the morning with his meowy alarm clock voice and broomed like a bike whenever he ran down the stairs. He loved being petted and he greeted me every time I walk thru the front door. Many nights I had slept holding on to his 2 small furry paws.. bliss!

After more than a week of frantic looking and calling my husband said, "Maybe we should go for a walk downstairs at the lobby and asked the security guards if they have seen him”. We were talking loudly at the lobby when I suddenly heard a frantic meow and saw a cream and brown ball hurtling towards me! Oh Nimbus Nimbus.. I was almost in tears of happiness.

No more running away boy! I was so thrilled for him to be home and he never wander far away after that.

Hand Foot and Mouth Disease

2009-04-01T11:27:00.005+08:00

Poor Eggy had fever last Friday and did not want to eat or drink any milk unless its from my breast directly. So I had to just let her drink milk for 2 days. On Sunday, I saw some red spots on her feet and on her bottom. I quickly sent her to the polyclinic nearby. The doctor there cud not confirm whether she had HFMD (which I suspected). He also did not take her temperature, nor opened her clothes to examine her body ... sheesh! He then gave her medicine for allergy (was there an allergic reaction??) and antibiotics (but babies sud not be given antiobiotics unless its very very critical!!). I just wrote him off as a very lousy doctor!

The next day, I took her to Damansara Specialist Hospital to see Dr Vasantha... immediately she diagnosed that it was HFMD by looking at the spots and checking her genitalia. She gave a pain numbing throat medication which must be given 30 mins before eating so that the pain will be gone to enable the child to eat, some Cataflam for the fever, Daktarin oral gel (treats fungal and bacterial infection). After a day of treatment, Eggy looked much better and by the next day, she could eat without relying on the pain numbing medication.

Doc said that she will take about 4 days to return to her usual self. So today, Wednesday, she is back to eating her normal portion... yay!

On the other hand, Cookie had high fever last night with axillary (armpit) temperature of 38.3 C which is considered high. Even with paracetamol, her fever refused to subside. I took her to the A+E at 11pm (dang! Marido is not in the country again!) The doctor told me that there is nothing much he can do cos I had already given the paracetamol at 9.45 and I sud not give another dose for another 4 hours (to prevent liver damage). So I had to sponge her when I got back and she went off to sleep. At 5am, she woke up warmish again and after her medication and sponging, she drifted off to sleep again.

This morning, i checked her throat and saw white dots.. sigh.. she caught the HFMD...so another round again. My hope is that neither my maid or I will catch it. I suppose we will know on Thursday or Friday.

p/s HFMD is not dangerous at all.. however I remembered that about 10 children died in Kuching some time ago of this. Probably because they cannot eat or drink due to pain and so they actually die of dehydration.

p/s 2 : I am definitely blessed that I dun have to worry about the big bill caused by this ... as it is.. it is almost the same amount as my sister's family get to claim for one year in her hubby's sorry organisation!

Call me Mem

2009-03-26T17:09:00.003+08:00

My kids have taken to calling me "Mem"... wait a minute.....actually only Eggy calls me that. Cookie has not articulated anything resembling mum or ma.. or even pa.. while Eggy is busy with papapapa and mem mem mum mum. But in terms of activity, Cookie has started pointing a week ago.. in her 10th month. She also looks set to start walking.

Bookwise, Cookie is so interested in books and will sit still as I read her a book or two. Eggy.. lets just say that after a page or two, she would prefer to eat the book!

It also seems that Eggy is taller than her sibling and loves to torture her by beating her... poor Cooks! She just sits there and cry away.. of course Mem comes to rescue her!

Nimbus gets eaten by Eggy too! When she sees him from a distance, she would start crawling very fast towards him. After grabbing him violently, she would proceed to gnaw at his ears.. poor chap! He does not like it very much and would bite her and scratch her in return... serves her right... I dun interfere as I think that older babies sud realise that animals should not be grabbed and bitten.

Cookie is rather gentle with him. And so Nimbus would content to sit next to her and let her carress him. What a lovely picture!

Some black and white shots

2009-03-26T16:19:00.004+08:00

Cookie looking pleased as she managed to get the ice-cream stick!

Eggy with a farnee face!

Cookie playing with "Mem"

Eggy looking like my friend Lawrence who has a bald head too!

The new Nicole Kidman

2009-02-26T08:36:00.003+08:00

Lottie at her 12th year formal.. that's what they call the prom in Australia. So grown up, yes? And such a lovely dress... may I borrow it? Kakaka! I can't even fit in it!

Cookie on the walker

2009-02-25T22:34:00.001+08:00

Cookie is 10 months in this and she can't stop walking with the walker.. she just goes on and on like an energiser bunny... but so farnee....

Eggy is quite reluctant to walk with the walker.. she prefers to stand and just hold on to it.

CNY and Christmas pix

2009-02-04T22:40:00.004+08:00

Mummy and Cookie

Cacat mummy and Eggy.

My in laws and the bubs.

Uncle Tim and Eggy (i think that she looks like him!)

Marido and his 4 girls! Where is my boy?? Poor chap.. he was left behind in Malaysia to be tortured by Elyon!

5 tips to living longer

2009-01-19T12:46:00.003+08:00

I have been watching this fab show during my ‘stint’ in Brisbane recently. While feeding my kids at 9.30am, I get to watch “What’s Good for You!’. There are many questions tackled during the one hour show. Today, I thought to just let you know about living longer.

1. Optimism – if you are the type that sees the glass to be half full.. you may just live longer than those who see it as half empty. How to get optimistic.. according to studies, you can do meditation, pray, retrain your mind…

2. Exercise – but of course, we know this already… but what we don’t know is that it’s not just the physical exercise.. mental ones are important too. So.. a half hour exercise of walking a day is ideal and an hour of shopping is even better… u get to exercise the body and the mind (by choosing and looking at interesting things).. what a great shocker for the wallet!!)

3. Eat well – what do you know… eating well… is my diet of bak-kut the every morning good? Hmm.. the Mediterranean diet is supposedly great… vino, pasta, tomatoes…plenty of antioxidants.

4. Friends – have more friends.. good friends apparently prolong your life… it’s not that family is not important but me thinks that family can create stress as you are stuck with them! (all u family who are reading this…what do you think?). Family can stave off the disability among the elderly tho according to studies which I cant verify cos I only caught bits and pieces of the show.

5. Getting married – sorry folks.. this only applies to men. Apparently men add 7 years to their lives by marrying cos of the element of care and concern given by their mates. Unfortunately for women… all that caring and giving takes years away from you as studies show that single women live longer than married ones… ok.. I better take some time off for rest and relaxation once in a while to ensure that I live long enough to continue to care for the hubby! An interesting note to add – if the man surrounds himself with women, he will live longer…. *dionngz* what does this mean.. he sud have loads of girl friends… well I think the studies only confined it to children. Men add 74 weeks to their lives for every daughter they have… hmmm… hubby will add 4 years to his life with our 3 girls! Women get 95 weeks for every kid regardless of gender! Does that mean that women are less bias about children gender?? Anyway, I wonder if this is true for asian cultures which ‘worship’ the male child!

Stories about my maid

2008-12-14T22:51:00.005+08:00

1) One of the days my cell leader called me up to ask me to facilitate the group. I agreed without realising that I did not copy the notes for last week's message by Pastor Daniel. I was leafing through my notes and to my dismay found out that I did not copy anything. I was lamenting to my maid about that and she coolly took her own notes and passed them to me! I was astonished.. how did she managed to take care of the babes during Sunday celebration in church and have time and inclination to take notes (in English too!)

2) I was shopping in Bandar Utama at the URS store for shoes. I was trying on some and my maid gave comments and urged me to buy a pair that she likes. I bought the slippers and had good comments from my Hermana, Marido and Cunada too! My maid has good taste! Sometimes she would comment on my clothes and say that I am underdressed for the occasion.. can u believe that?

3)My maid came to Malaysia with no knowledge of Malaysian cooking styles.. within 6 months, she was cooking nyonya, malay, chinese and indian dishes... yummy!! Eg of what she does.. delicious old cucumber soup, ayam sioh, ayam dry curry, ayam rendang, yam rice with bak kut teh, ayam masak merah, bbq pork ribs, all sorts of veges, steamed fish with ginger and tomato, etc etc I must say that when I passed her the recipe books, I did not expect such excellence! Now I have bought her a mixer so that she can bake cakes too! More of that after CNY since I will be in Australia from Xmas till CNY. Anyway, I have told her that she better be a chef when she gets back to Indonesia... what a waste of talents otherwise!!

4) My maid loves my cat as much as I do.. she has also started giving him a smooch every day now in the morning... kakaakaka! But I only allow her to bathe kids but not the cat! The cat's bath is my job!

5) My maid is famous in my apartment. Almost everyone who gets to know me will tell me that they have seen her around wheeling the kids for a walk or to play in the pool. I think she enjoys the attention she gets wheeling the twins around... people actually stop her to chat to her.. how many maids can claim that the neighbours are friendly and chat to them!?

6) My maid is truly acting like my housekeeper and my time keeper.. just today, i was due for a Xmas party at 6.30pm. At 6pm, she told me that I had to stop talking to my kid (eldest daughter- 16) and had to pump milk and go off! Housekeeper? Oh.. she is very houseproud and will lament "Oh my house is so messy.. I best go and clean up now!"

Even More Twin Pix

2008-12-14T22:26:00.005+08:00

Grrr...This is Eggy looking upset cos Cookie has her hand on her butt! Doesn't Eggy look like a little duck?

Hmm.. I find this photo hilarious! They are on their high chair waiting for breakfast! They are on 2 solid meals a day.. can be 3 but I am too lazy.. or rather I am waiting for them to grow up a bit more!

Swimming in the pool.. I started them at the pool since they were 5 months old. They love it! But these days it's been raining cats and cats... and more cats... and so they have been moping at home.. together with my cat! Poor darling.. my cat i mean!

Esteve, Ashton, Hofma and Takamine

2008-11-25T21:23:00.002+08:00

These are not names of the men I love! However, it must be names of men before they put it on their beloved guitars. Ahem... if they were men.. I would be mostl likely interested in Esteve.. Spanish mah! I was looking at these guitars in a shop today and managed to get all the prices and heard them being played... of course the best was the most expensive out of these brands- the Esteve.. the problem is that there is no website that talked about the model I am looking at the Esteve 3G163 I did find a french website said that it's a child guitar... ???

Well, the guitar sang.. it had a beautiful voice. But I better check out other Spanish guitars before I decide!

Why do I want a guitar.. well I got fed up of not getting the right chords during my song leading at cell group.. when u don't get the right notes, u either end up screeching like a wild cat or bellowing like a bull. Both are not great for being making a joyful and nice noise!

Fraternal Twins

2008-11-08T04:49:00.002+08:00

You know, people tell me that they cannot differentiate between my 2 girls. Even my sister has trouble sometimes. Well, I guess that it must be hard if u have just seen the girls.. cos they are both almost 6.5kgs at 6 months and are also about the same height and have the same head circumference!

But to me that is where the similarity ends. Here are some examples of how they differ.

Cookie	Eggy
Olive complexion	Fair complexion
Soulful eyes	Oriental eyes
Curled lashes (mascara)	Straight lashes
Smiles with great delight	Smiles shyly
Mummy's nose	Daddy's nose
Shouts	Screeches

Some behavioural differences. Cookie has started crawling.. or rather creeping at 4 months and so now, she is all over the place knocking her head on so many things that got in her way. She also seems to want to grab anything and she will keep trying by crawling right towards the thing and screaming her head off when she is blocked by some obstacle. She also bulldozes past things (even going on top of Eggy) to reach her goal. Eggy seems contented to just stay at the same position (developmentally she seems about 2 months behind even though they are only 2 mins apart- but all babies develop differently ;) ) Sometimes when Eggy pushes her head up and she finds that she cannot stay up long, she would just collapse with her head sideways on the mat (rather violently too!) and when she gets tired with too much pushing her head up, she would giggle by herself and smile before giving up!

Cookie Cutting her first tooth

2008-11-01T16:06:00.002+08:00

OOh.. Cookie cut her first tooth yesterday.. that would explain why she was kinda out of sorts these days.. a bit grumpy and refusing to feed. Hmmm.. so is Eggy actually.. so she won't be far behind. They just turned 6 months!

They have started on rice cereal with mummy's milk and they have been at it for the last 3 weeks. After 3 weeks, they have finally finish the cereal with relish. Time to start them on rice porridge next week.. after my financial exams on Monday and Thursday.

I am still pumping away for them. I produce about 250ml++ per pump and I pump 6x a day.. so that works out to be more than 1.5 liters per day or actually close to 2 liters. That is a far cry from my initial days of only 60ml or less per pump. All the hard work of diligently pumping every 3-4 hours (even during the night!) paid off. And I also stay at the pump for at least half and hour. What a cow!! So this cow is able to feed her babies fully on her own milk... ;).

More twins pix

2008-10-27T23:28:00.007+08:00

I love this photo of my twins.. they look as tho they were planning something farnee and are laughing or snickering about it.

Cookie looks like she's gonna do the joget... and Eggy looks horrified at that thought! Both wearing hand-me-downs from their cousin Elysia.

This was taken at Sepang Goldcoast. It's such a gorgeous place. My twins in animal clothings... given of course by someone.... I did not buy them!

And look at the chalets behind us. The chalets go out until 2km into the sea!

Itty Bitty Baby Girls.. er Boy

2008-10-27T09:19:00.002+08:00

I was listening to the baby lullaby type of song titled "Itty Bitty Baby Girl" but I can't help singing it as

Itty Bitty Baby Boy
Daddy's pride and Mummy's Joy
Tiny treasure so petite
But great is the joy that you bring
To your daddy and me

Our love for you
Will only grow stronger each day
For yes, it's true
You've stolen our hearts away
And my little boy
You're just the right size today
To hold in my arms
To look in your eyes and say

Sigh! What a sweet boy!

Video of the Cookie and the Egg (m&m)

2008-10-06T22:44:00.001+08:00

The Egg fell at Sepang Goldcoast

2008-09-26T12:04:00.003+08:00

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king's horses and all the king's men
Couldn't put Humpty together again.

In my case it was:

Humpty Dumpty laid in her pram
Humpty Dumpty fell- head hit the land
Papa picked her up and prayed she'd be fine
Praise God, she only cried... no cracks no lines!

We were at Sepang Goldcoast on the 30th Aug on Saturday for a meal with some good friends (one who is in charge of the development of this gorgeous place). We were to have a meal on the deck by the sea. Unfortunately the deck only had stairs up and so we had to lift the pram up. When my maid and Marido was trying to do so, my maid accidentally lifted her front of the pram without realising that Marido was not holding on the back of the pram and it fell backwards with Eggy slipping out of the pram head down and dropping like an egg on the concrete floor! Aiiii! My heart almost stopped! I thought that she may have broken her neck in that fall.

However, Marido picked her up immediately and just prayed for her. My maid for so distraught that she started crying. I was surprisingly calm. After crying piteously for abt 15 mins, Eggy calmed down and seemed fine after that. I thought that her head a bit senget after that but when I checked with her paed 2 days later, he assured me that it was ok.

Optimistic!

2008-09-24T16:18:00.003+08:00

I saw this on a door in my 2nd office:-

Soldier : Sir.. we are completely surrounded!!
Commander : Excellent! Then we can shoot from any side.

Are they boys?

2008-09-21T21:15:00.004+08:00

That is the question I keep getting everytime I go out with them... even though they are wearing dresses. I guess that the bald heads certainly makes them look like baby boys. Sigh!

Anyway, don't they look farnee??? So hilarious. I better get a shot of them crying.. it's very very farnee.. really!

Cookie and Eggy

2008-09-21T21:02:00.006+08:00

Was at Avillion and decided to put both the girls in the bubble bath- this is Eggy! Farnee eh?

Cookie enjoying the bubbles...!

Cookie looking like she is running in the pool.

Eggy asleep peacefully with Cookie playing by herself at the background.

Cookie sticking out her tongue...; p

Leaving you

2008-09-18T04:24:00.008+08:00

I had loved you for far too long than I should. Even after you caused me not a small amount of anguish with the nasty people that you have bred within your fold. I had been so blind to your faults because I wanted so badly to give you a chance to prove yourself true to me. But after giving you a chance for almost enough time to bring a child to this world, I feel that I have to move on in my life.

But why? Well, you continued to allow the other woman (devastatingly gorgeous but supremely evil) to try to get rid of me from the first day I arrived, you were unfaithful by giving all your time to someone else there too and totally neglecting me even though you knew that I was the one who needed the most attention for the relationship to work. You continued to allow another person to dictate the nuances of the relationship which you knew would cause a friction! It seems like you have no idea what it takes to make this work!

You allowed everyone concerned to work in silos and bred such a hostile and secretive culture. I did love you, pls never think that I did not.. in fact I loved you so much that I even neglected the new people in my life who needed me more than you did.

But I now see the light.... so I am leaving you with a heavy heart but still knowing that if I put my time and effort in this new person... it would be worth it.. becos I can bring the person to join me in the next side of heaven.

I guess you could say that I intend to be a good steward what what I had asked for.

Therefore goodbye... but never think that I was not grateful... I do thank you for being a part of my life when I needed that reassurance that I was still capable in getting your attention even though it was shortlived. Farewell...

New Pix of Twins

2008-07-15T04:25:00.006+08:00

Since I barely have time to blog these days, i will just post some pictures of the little ones - these were taken when they were about 1-2 months only and weighing a sad 3kgs only.

Looks like they are trying to get the rose above their heads. Photo taken during their private full moon when they turned one month.

Dada trying to be funny with Eggy!

Isn't Nimbus such a giant cat!!

My 3 girls - looks like they belong to my eldest girl huh?

Crybabies!

My Only Son

2008-07-15T04:18:00.004+08:00

These days has been hectic with feeding babies in the wee hours of the morning, once more when I wake up for work, driving around in traffic, coping with a new boss, pumping milk at work (much to the chagrin of my colleagues as the milk smells), trying to leave work on time, eating enough to take care of myself and finally trying to sleep the required 6 hours a night. As you can tell from my blog time, I have just finished a feeding session together since I am awake while everyone else in this house is sleeping!

In moments of stress in coping with the new additions in my family, I turn to my only son for comfort. He is such a constant wonder- he seems to anticipate my mood and comes to me to allow me to give him a big squeeze so that I feel much better. Somehow, hugging the cat makes me feel heck of a lot calmer esp when the babies just finished a long bout of crying.

Here are 2 updated pix of NImbus!

Reflux!

2008-06-18T19:39:00.002+08:00

I have nicknamed my twin 1 as Cookie and Twin 2 as Eggy. Reason : Cookie makes a noise like a kookaburra and Eggy simply looks like an egg!

Eggy has been crying inconsolably for the last 2 weeks and it has wreaked havoc on my sleep pattern and my own well being (not to mention poor Eggy's too). I took note on all her behaviour and checked with my book and it all points to 'reflux'. I took her to the local paed who told me to change my milk formula to something thicker (hello.. I am breastfeeding).. then she told me to put cereal in the milk (hey bodoh! My anak is only 1.5 months old). As you can tell, I gave up on that paed.

I then took her to the paed who tended to her when she was born. He agreed that it was reflux and prescribed Losec Mups. He was writing down in his sheet "Once a day" and then Eggy threw up in my arms.... "Make that twice a day".

At first the medication worked well, Eggy was still throwing up but no longer crying like she was dying. But after one week, she started crying inconsolably again. Took her back... this time she was pumped with Zantac and also Colimix (which, btw is not supposed to be taken by infants less than 6 months.. sigh).

After the 3 drugs, she proceeded to sleep for the next 2 days.. with her body all floppy and only waking up to feed. Today is her 3rd day and I had reduced the medication to only Losec Mups and Zantac. And tomorrow I shall only feed her with Zantac. Both these medicines are acid inhibitors - meaning they reduced the production of acid in the stomach. None that really solves the problem of the weak spincter (the valve that prevents food from coming back up from the stomach).

However, the doctor says that the problem should go away in about 2 month. I hope so... cos Marido has the same problem but he is controlling it by eating Probiotics and exercising.

CONFINEment Lady

2008-06-02T14:21:00.001+08:00

The concept of the confinement lady or confinement period is probably a weird one to my in-laws. But it's an age old one with the chinese community here in Malaysia and if I am not mistaken, other cultures like the Malays and the Indians have their own version too.

Well, I looked out for a confinement lady when I had passed the critical 3 months period. I called 3 different ones and they were all booked. I had one lady in Penang who was rather excited to take on twins but she had a bung knee and found that climbing stairs too difficult. So I did not take her. In desperation, I had one confinement lady recommend one for me. Her name was Peggy (so cool huh.. one wud think that confinement ladies are called Auntie So and So). Peggy is 62 years old but very sturdy and looks healthy.

She arrived on the day I returned from the hospital. Good thing I did not get her in earlier as i could hardly eat anything on the first day post op as the body rejected water and food. Kept on vomitting as I kept on trying to take sips of water.. bad idea!

Peggy came with bags and bags of things. She looked like she was moving house. But that was a good thing as she came very prepared. She promptly started preparing dishes for me. I had lotsa ginger (but not that much-maybe I find it ok).. but there was like 3kgs of Bentung ginger (apparently the China variety is not that nice to eat).

I have been enjoying good food... so nice to have Peggy around..it's like having a mum.. a little naggy but I feel rather pampered.. lucky me! She does not come cheap though.. but i figured that since the way I take care of my health during this period may determine my overall health later in life (this is what the Chinese believe), it's worth the money! ;)

She takes care of the babies for all their needs except their nutritional ones.. this is where she hands the babies to me each time they cry for a feed (even at night). At the moment, I am feeding on demand... hmm.. trying to see if I can set a routine but that will only happen after Peggy goes home.

Malaysia Artistes for Unity - Here in my Home

2008-05-21T15:48:00.003+08:00

Here is where my blood was shed (when I was born) and where my twin daughters were born too.. here is to Malaysia.. and may we be colour blind!

Hold on brother hold on
The road is long. We’re on stony ground
But I’m strong. You ain’t heavy

Oh there’s a misspoken truth that lies
Colors don’t bind, oh no.
What do they know? They speak falsely.

Chorus:
Here in my home
I’ll tell you what its all about
There’s just one hope here in my heart
One Love undivided
That’s what it’s all about
Please won’t you fall in one by one by one [with me]?

Push back sister won’t you push back?
Love won’t wait. Just keep pushing on.
Yes I’m strong. You ain’t heavy.

Oh don’t you worry about that…
What we have the shadows can’t deny
Don’t you know it’s now or never?

Rap:
[Malay: TRANSLATED]
Years of fears and years of tribulation
The heart keeps searching for that endless devotion

[Chinese: TRANSLATED]
Hand in hand we’ll march like blood brothers
I speak for my people hope we’ll find peace forever

[Tamil: TRANSLATED]
May the road ahead quench my thirst for success
May the road behind echo a song of the blessed

[English]
So I will let it be known yes I feel it in my bones
No matter where I roam this is home sweet home
Sing!

Instant Weight Loss Programme

2008-05-17T13:38:00.005+08:00

I have to admit that giving birth is such an excellent weight loss programme. I did not manage to weigh myself right after I left the hospital but after one week, when I went back, I had lost 10kgs thereabouts and 10 inches off my waistline.. yippee! So happy to see that. So altho I still look like I am six months pregnant, I am rather glad that there is no longer the heaviness of the belly when I walk.. what a huge relief!

My weight is now at 55kgs.. that is also another minor miracle. That means I only have 5 kgs to lose to reach my original weight of 50kgs.. not to hard I suppose. But at the moment, the amount of food that I am eating definitely does not allow me to lose weight. I eat many times a day.

7am - A glass of warm fresh milk/ milo
10am - A steaming bowl of noodles with ginger wine
1pm - Lunch with 3 dishes and rice
2pm- A plate of apples
2.30pm - A cup of Tang Long wine/DOM double boiled with chicken
5pm - Dessert - either Red Bean soup, corn on the cob, some kind of black bean soup etc
7.30pm - Dinner with 2-3 dishes with rice
11pm - Nesvita or some late night snack!
3am - Nesvita
All days - drinking not plain water but Red dates water.

I need to eat so much to keep up the breast feeding. So have not lost any weight but who cares... I don't...;)

Breastfeeding after Caesarean

2008-05-15T17:21:00.005+08:00

I was worried initially that having a c-section will mean that I have a lot of difficulty breastfeeding. But my fear was unfounded. Although it was a bit more troublesome trying to breastfeed as you have to put yourself up (hence using stomach muscles - which is painful when you have had the operation) but it is still manageable if you stay in a breastfeeding friendly hospital or you have an extremely supportive husband who brings the baby to you when it is feeding time.

Also, having good pain relief helps as well. I was on morphine for 3 days post partum. That helps me to be more mobile as I don't feel as much pain as I should have if I had not had any pain relief.

However, one has to be careful that you do not carry the baby while walking during the first 10 days post operation. For my case, after 10 days, I was still in some pain and should refrain from bending at the wound area or carry heavy things. Hence, no carrying water or anything more than one liter of water.

Even after 2 weeks and 5 days, the area above and below my wound is still painful or rather tender... wonder why.. I guess being older does slow down the healing process...

Jozua And other baby

2008-05-13T20:40:00.002+08:00

My Twin pictures

2008-05-12T19:04:00.004+08:00

Here are some shots :

Mummy with M ia and M ikayla (from here I cannot tell who is who).

M+Ms

M kayla wide eyed - Day one

M ia sleeping- Day One

Weak US and Zimbabwe Economy

2008-05-09T20:26:00.004+08:00

The Wall Street Journal Monday, May 5, 2008

For Tony Crooks, 48 years old, of Austin, Texas, there is little reason for optimism. Laid off from a residential-construction firm in late February, he has been applying for up to eight jobs per week. The only offers pays 20-30% less than he wants to earn, he says.

"A lot of your better jobs are filled," he says. He says that he and his wife, who works for an engineering firm, try to save money by eating at home and avoiding driving. "Vacation is out of the question." he said.

GDP - per capita is $46,000 (2007 est.) The unemployment rate is 4.8%. Population below poverty line is at 12% and inflation is at 2.7%.

Zimbabwe Economy 2008

The government of Zimbabwe faces a wide variety of difficult economic problems as it struggles with an unsustainable fiscal deficit, an overvalued official exchange rate, hyperinflation, and bare store shelves.

GDP per capita is US$500 only (2007 est). The unemployment rate is at an appalling 80%. Population below poverty line is at 68% and inflation is at a whooping 6072%.

In contrast to Zimbabwe, what the US is facing.. pales in comparison and yet......

Finally, our own babies' birthday ticker

2008-05-07T13:16:00.004+08:00

Delivery via C-section

2008-05-05T19:31:00.019+08:00

When I visited the gynae on Friday and he told me that at 36 weeks, the twins are progressing well and that since they are both breeched, I will have no choice but to do a c-section. He recommended that I go for the operation at the end of next week (Friday). I looked at my belly and heaved a sigh.. the pain of the weight was really unbearable now. I then told the gynae that I would like them out as soon as possible, Monday would be good.

He looked at his secretary who then quickly scooted out and confirmed that Monday at 4pm was a suitable time.

I had a relatively awful time during the weekend as I was soooo heavy that walking anywhere really was a torture. On the night before I went to the hospital, I could hardly sleep as it got too painful each time the twins moved. So you can imagine my tiredness when I checked into the hospital (with my 6 bags - out of the 6, 2 were eyebags! and 2 pillows - later I found out that I needn't have brought the diapers along). When they put me in my single room (I truly wanted a single room for more privacy!), I ended up sitting on the chair while Marido fell asleep on the bed. In fact, when the anesthesiologist came over to discuss with me pain relief options, he did a flip when he saw a man on my bed! ;) I was given 2 options - epidural or spinal block. Doctor said that he would try for the epidural as it has less side effects.

So at 3.30pm, I was wheeled into the operating theatre.. it was quite an experience being wheeled in.. felt like I was on TV. There were about 5 nurses in the theatre whom I chatted to while they were preparing me for the operation. They were remarking that my heartbeat was so calm... "Have you done this before?" Nope I had not but really, what was there to be afraid of? Other than bleeding to death??? Or the pain relief did not work (Like my friend Linda who had an operation was like aware of that op when she was supposed to be under GA).

I was made to sit up and to curl my spine. I saw Dr Helmi take out a huge syringe ... wow! That was one big needle.. imagine the size of the epidural needle... !! I kept looking at him putting stuff into the needle and he was looking at me and told me not to look.. just in case it freaked me out.. but nah! It did not. How can something that will help my pain make me freak out!

The 1st jab was probably the most painful experience of the entire operation. Sharp pain but very bearable. Then when the site was numb, he inserted the epidural needle (fortunately Marido was not there yet or else he would have fainted!!

Then, the next half and hour or so (fortunately there was a clock conveniently within my view) I waited for the numbness to set into the lower part of my body.

Marido joined me right after they inserted the epidural needle and he recited to me Proverbs 31 about the virtuous woman... ie me... who does good to her husband and not harm... etc. I was moved to tears as he concluded and gave me a kiss on my head.

It was really freaky when the time came to 4pm (schedule for the operation) and I could still feel my legs and worse still.. I could move them.. much to the horror of my anesthesiologist who kept on pumping drugs into me. All that drug really made me feel high.. I was practically floating on cloud nine and wanted to burst into song... seriously. It's a feeling like you've down a bit too much beer in the hot afternoon that everything feels nice and cool. They actually strapped my right hand down which annoyed me cos I started to feel really itchy and wanted to scratch all over. I kept calling the nurse to scratch my hand, arms, head... but it was terribly itchy. I even used my teeth to rub against my free hand. Apparently it was the side effect of epidural.

At 4.30pm, Dr Guna's head popped out of the curtain and said hello to me.. he also said "I am going to start the operation!" The whole procedure felt like an out of this world thing. I could feel them tugging and sticking something inside me but I felt no pain. What a wondrous thing! I kept on wincing and making little noises much to Marido's chagrin. He has an 'uneasy tummy'. When the first twin arrived and Marido saw her... he turned decidedly white that one of the doctors had to get the nurse to escort him out. Hence he did not manage to see the 2nd baby when she came out. When they cleaned the babies, Dato Dr Musa (the paed) showed them to me... ai yee! They look nothing like me!! Oh gosh.. the faces looked like Marido.. where is the hair????

The next half hour or so, I was stitched up.. I was almost asleep.. kinda sleepy. Then when it was all over, they wheeled me out and transfered me to the single room where I promptly start to shiver... not of the cold but of the effects of the epidural. I shook like I was in a discotheque and I scratched like a dog with fleas during the next 1.5 hours.

Within an hour after I got moved to my room, they feed the babies with formula milk via a cup cos their blood sugar level was too low. After that.. I am not sure when, they took the babies and gave them to me to feed them their colostrum. Very little but very nutritious. I was glad that they took to the breast. Relief! The nurses there were very supportive, every single one of them when they visited me would ask me about my breastfeeding and even giving me a reassuring pat that I did well. ;)

All night, I kept feeding them every 2 hours and was very very exhausted the next morning. But I was happy! They got their feed from their mummy.. what an achievement!

Babies' names

2008-05-03T09:07:00.006+08:00

I have decided to name my two girls M ia and M ikayla.

M ia has been the name I have used as a non de plume for this blog. It also means Mine in Spanish. Blessed Girl of Mine...... wonderful. So I thought that it is a very sweet name... short too. However, after I named my first born twin M ia, my housekeeper told me that in the area where she comes from in Indonesia, there are heaps of M ias... ka ka.. apparently it's not that unique a name here in Malaysia.

I initially wanted to name my 2nd twin M el.. but objections from many quarters citing reasons such as too popular a name (M el C, M el B, stars with that name) and also not to mention the ever handsome M el Gibson who is a MAN! Then I thought of another one syllable name - Mae. However, I already have quite a few Mays, Maes in my life so I thought that that was not suitable. Then after consulting and bugging Marido, we narrowed it down to Maegan (to be able to call Mae when we need to) and M ikayla/Michaela. Ok Ok it's 3 syllables but the name sounded sweet. Then when one of my good friends smsed me to say that she thought that Michaela was a great name with our combined surnames, I decided immediately that we sud be calling my 2nd twin M ikayla. In Hebrew, it means Gift of God (which she certainly is.. we never expected the joy of twins) and also means "Who is like God"... what a great meaning her name has. I guess we could shorted her name to Kay, or Mick or Mike depending on what feels good on our tongue as we watch her grow a little more.

Straight As

2008-04-27T15:08:00.002+08:00

Mr and Mrs Tan was looking at their son's academic report card and were shaking their heads. "Joe, why can't u get straight As like your cousin Mark?" "This is very disappointing... u know?"
'What is it that he has that you don't have?"

Joe simply looked at his parents and without batting an eyelid said "Hmm.... Different parents..."

My babies are coming!

2008-04-25T18:37:00.002+08:00

I planned to have a c-section this coming Monday on the 28th April at 4pm to deliver the babies. I would have like to have a natural birth but seeing that they are both breeched as of today, it is highly unlikely that they will move to be engaged by next week. Anyway, I think that the lack of space makes it hard for them to move much except to kick and punch... oof!

Elective caesarean then! Checking into the hospital at 10am. Only allowed toast and milo at 9am.... so sad... I will soooo hungry. Anyway, I am sure I will survive. Marido initially did not want to be with me during the op. I think he does not want to freak out but I insisted that he be there for support... after all this is a 2 person effort, right?

The gynae was suggesting that I sud do a c-section next friday but I am already so big that I dunno what will happen by next Friday. I think that a planned c-sect is safer than an emergency one (which is what will happen if I wait for the contractions to come). So I asked to be cut up sooner. Since the doctor said that the babies will not likely need neo-natal care.,... it's ok... yippee!!

They will be small .. as babies go.. abt 2.6kgs but combined.. they are a whopper! In fact, my father-in-law's waistline is the same as mine! Har har. And a friend of mine solemnly said "It is interesting to note that at one point in time, ur waistline is larger than mine."

Well... so in total, I gained about 19-20 kgs... not bad considering I did not bloat up that much. I kinda looked like I put on about 4 kgs overall and everything else went to the kids.

Okie.. babies.. mummy is looking forward to meeting u... man! Is my life going to change.... phew!

Weight and Waistline

2008-04-22T14:01:00.004+08:00

1st month - 50kgs and about 26 inches in waist
2nd month - 48kgs and about 25 inches in waist
3rd month - 45 kgs and about 27 inches in waist
4th month - 50kgs and about ????
5th month - 53kgs and about ????
5 1/2 month -55kgs and about 34 inches in waist
6th month - 56 kgs and about 38 inches in waist (yicks!)
7th months - 57 kgs and about 40 inches in waist (measured at 28 weeks)
8th months - 60kgs and about 42 inches in waist (measured at 32 weeks)
9th months - 64kgs and about 44 inches in waist (measured at 36 weeks)- stretch marks starting to show

As you can tell, I am very very tired of being pregnant already. I can hardly walk and it hurts to move around. I was like practically begging the doctor to deliver my babies earlier.....

7 things I could not have done without during pregnancy

2008-04-22T13:21:00.005+08:00

1) Belly Support Belt
My good friend in Australia bought me a support belt and it was such a godsend. I got Marido to buy another for me to for rotation.... and it really helps with the aches of the back and also with the weight of the babies since they are heavier than normal singletons. It's a wonder why women don't get them.. for the RM100++ they are worth it....!! Rather than suffer the aches and pains.
2) Ginger tea
Man! I was throwing up so much that anything that helps with the nausea - I would take it. Ginger tea in any form, powder, home made, store made...etc. It takes the edge of the nausea. Problem is you gotta down it all the time.. and ginger is 'heaty'.
3) Assam boi
I just had a funny tongue throughout most of the pregnancy so the asam boi certainly helps. I bought like 300 biji of asam... yummy! Bought them from Old Town PJ for a song!
4) Bread +Dry Crackers
Ok.. so I developed a huge liking for bread.. and the dry crackers were helping during the nausea stage. I like pizza too.. anything bready! I think that the body was just craving for carbohydrates since I threw up so much and pretty much had nothing in the tank!
5) Fajitas
Another carbohydrate filled food... but I loved it! It was like one of the only things I could stomach during those hazy days of nausea. However, until now, I still associate Fajitas with my early pregnancy.... yuck!
6) Barley, Cincau, Coconut Juice
When I could not stomach plain water, I seem to get some hydration from these traditionally 'no-no' drinks. My smum always scolds me when I drink these 'bad' drinks but hey.. my body seems to like them.. so take lah.
7) Bio Oil
I started rubbing Bio-Oil since my 2nd trimester. And I have not stopped since.... twice a day.. and I had a smooth belly until yesterday.. sob!! I guess the trauma of having 2 babies was just too much even for Bio Oil.

Waddling like a duck and feeling like a beached whale!

2008-04-21T11:19:00.004+08:00

I have always wondered why pregnant women waddle like a duck... I now wonder no more. Somehow, the weight in the front shifts the centre of gravity for the person to the front and we find it hard to walk like we normally do. Also, the legs cannot seem to close nicely so we have to walk terkangkang.. which is soooo ungraceful. Really look like either a duck or penguin! Ok.. at least they are cute.. I dunno if I look cute or just clumsy! Fortunately Marido is very very patient with me when we walk together... I take 4 times the time to get to a place then I used to.

Well... I feel like a whale esp when I am in bed trying to turn... I wonder why there is pain when I do so... the pelvic area hurts. And also when I am on my side.. which is the supposed best position.. I still feel like I am in pain. Yuck!

Tried watching some movies at the theatre.. managed to catch "Definitely, Maybe" - sad show.. divorces are always sad. And also caught "27 dresses" - now that was funnier but also Silly! Thank goodness the seats at the movies are comfortable. Otherwise I would have left halfway.

Hmm.. I have bitten my nails to the bones in the anticipation of the impending birth. Walau! Gross looking nails. Mantra "Not Long to go, not long to go,......."

Gestational Diabetes

2008-04-19T21:48:00.003+08:00

In my last blog, I mentioned that I felt extremely thirsty all the time. I read up about that and it seems I may have gestational diabetes... oh dear.. I have to admit that I have since stop drinking plain water (my tongue wants to taste sweet stuff) and have been guzzling down soft drinks.. bad bad. that would have contributed to this. Also, readings says that I will also start going to toilet more often. and what do you know.. in the night, I had to get up 5 times to visit the loo. GREAT!!!

Today, I forced myself to drink plain water... yuck yuck.. which is abnormally not yuck for me when i am not pregnant... somehow the tongue has this icky feeling there.... cis!

Well, I must take care of myself.... must take care of myself... do not give in to the tongue... blegh!

On Maternity Leave

2008-04-18T17:30:00.003+08:00

I will be starting my maternity leave on the 21st April. Nevermind if the babies have not arrived yet. I simply cannot walk or work without feeling tired and I would feel really bad about it.

So will be at week 36 during the 21st April week. This is actually very good news for me... that I have made it pass the critical 35th week. At week 35, the kidneys are fully developed, and the livers can process some waste products. Most of the basic physical development is complete —they'll spend the next few weeks putting on weight. Yippee.. what a relief off my mind. That would mean that if they come out now, lesser chance of being in the NICU. Phew!!

My big question is ... how do I know when to go to the hospital.. Doc said that to go when I am in pain.... but I have no idea what the pain will be like... some people tell me it's like diarrhea and others tell me it's like period cramps... some others tell me that they just feel some pain in the belly area... so I guess I shall have to find out for myself since every birth is kinda different.

Sleeping is getting harder now... I had to toss and turn (rather painfully too) to get comfortable. I feel that I am most comfortable sitting straight up but that is no way to sleep.

A funny thing today- I noticed that I get very very thirsty all of a sudden.. keep wanting to drink. Wonder why? And yet I don't go to the toilet that often... strange hoh?

My own baby ticker

2008-04-14T11:12:00.001+08:00

Can't believe I am going to be a mother

2008-04-13T22:02:00.005+08:00

Yesterday, while rubbing my belly with Bio Oil (for prevention of stretch marks and itchiness), the reality of becoming a mother hit me. The babies were moving quite a lot and I could feel them either pushing the uterus with their hands and legs.. what an amazing feeling.

I wonder about these 2 beings - who are alive and literally kicking in here. Wonder how my life will be like when they are out. As it is, my world revolves around them..

I can't go out much cos it hurts to walk to much,
I am not at the office working as climbing stairs may trigger contractions,
I find myself breathless all day (heart beat close to 200 per minute1-normal heartbeat is about 60-100 per minute) as the medication makes me feel this way, but I gotta take it as it's a tocolytic (prevent premature labour)
I can't eat much as they are crowding out my stomach,
I can't stand when I washing my hair as it gets painful,
I am scratching like a cat cos somehow, the body is finding it hard to cope with all the changes,
I tend to read more materials on pregnancy and baby raising cos I am a first time mummy and need all the help I can get,
I find getting comfortable difficult due to my burgeoning size,
I knock my tummy into things (and it hurts) as I underestimate the sheer size of the belly,
I waddle like a duck and look totally ungraceful cos of I can't seem to close my legs when I walk
I find my eyesight deteriorating, probably due to the hormone changes,
I roll my eyes every time my neighbour Matthew does a "Woah! Look at that size" when he sees me,

Sometimes when I look at my belly in front of the mirror, I am just bowled over by how the body is capable of keeping something akin to a huge watermelon in it. All round and smooth. The incredible ability of the body to sustain life... I am awed by the creation of God. How can anyone say there is no master designer..? I am so aware that each day I live and breathe, it's by His grace.

Well, not long to go now. Before I know it, they will be out, grown up and live their own lives and I will be wondering where the years have gone. But as for now, I am learning to appreciate the last few moments left of the pregnancy. It's tough, but not as tough as the 1st 3 months of the pregnancy. Nothing I have ever faced compared with that trauma of throwing up and feeling like I am losing my life. I wonder if I dare to venture that path again.

Well, here's to life and more lives.....

Nimbus's reaction to my little ones

2008-04-12T12:09:00.002+08:00

I think about my cat and wonder if he will get jealous once the twins arrive? I would feel so bad if he got so distraught that he refuses to eat (read that cats may do that if they are very upset). Well... Marido and I have determined that the babies sud be in their own room across ours and Nimbus can continue to sleep in our bed tucked in cosily next to Marido.

I wonder if our idea to keep the babies in their own room will work. I just read in "The Baby Whisperer" book that babies below 6 pounds/2.7kgs will need to feed every 2 hours... Astagfirrullahhalazim... I would be like a cow feeding them. I may have to move to their room to minimise movement on my side. But hey... I will share more with u about that later.

This is a photo of Nimbus which I love.. there are many more but this one of him looks so ...er.... how sud I put it.. serene. He is truly a darling cat. Now.. tell me how many cats will allow you to shower them without scratching you or even putting up a fuss. He really is a gentle giant for a cat... 5kgs... about 30% larger than most kucing kampung.

Another week at Home

2008-04-11T16:01:00.005+08:00

Saw Dr Guna again this morning... that is him on the left but it's not my baby. He is such a pleasant doctor... anyway my CTG shows that my uterus is relatively calm but he is taking no chances... another week of bed rest for me and still on Terbutaine -2.5mg (Britaline) but on a lesser dosage.. twice a day. Man.. that is still going to make my heart palpitate and me feel ill.

After this week - I sud be 35 weeks old and he will not stop if the contractions come. Ooh.... i am going to have to feel the pain of labour... ai!!

According to many readings on the net, it would be normal to have crying bouts in the last few weeks.... wow! I certainly don't want that. Nevermind... i think I feel too tired to be bothered. Right now, I am still working from home but resting every 2 hours or so.

But I can see my work plans slipping down the drain.... oh dear.. too many things and so little time now.

Scratching like a dog or cat....

2008-04-07T17:46:00.001+08:00

Another ridiculous thing happened to me last night.. I started scratching like crazy.... I am not sure what happened.. I just woke up scratching my hands, palms, arms.... very itchy. Apparently it is called "obstetric cholestasis" which is a rare condition in late pregnancy that is caused by bile salts being deposited under the skin. If it gets very severe, it may lead to maternal jaundice, liver failure, premature delivery and even stillbirth.. great! .. another thing to worry about!

I wonder if this is similar to something that Goat had.. where she kept on scratching and scratching and driving herself crazy.

Will check with gynae when I see him next this week. Due for CTG tomorrow anyway.

What harm can 16 flights of steps do?

2008-04-06T10:58:00.008+08:00

On Wednesday, there was a huge thunderstorm that somehow shortcircuited my offices security system and also the lift. So I had to walk 3 flights of steps down that evening. On Thursday, I had to climb up that 3 flights of steps (not to mention the 1.5 flight from car park to ground level) and climb down again for meetings with merchants and then up again, then down again... all in all, about 16 flights.

At 6pm, I went to the toilet and to my surprise.. after I had urinated, I found my pants wet.. cud not tell if it was urine or amniotic fluid.. (nose not that sensitive!). I quickly drove home, took a shower and washed the hair, ate my dinner, called the hospital and after getting the advice from a staff nurse to come for a CTG, we drove to the hospital at about 8.30pm.

The CTG showed contractions that were one min apart.. not huge ones but mild ones that were dangerous enough. Unfortunately I could not feel anything since my skin was already so tight. I spoke to Dr Guna on the phone and he advised me that I am to be admitted, put on drip (to stop the contractions), given a steroid jab (to mature the babies' lungs), antibiotics (Augmentin- to prevent any infection) and to be monitored all night until he sees me in the morning.

Off I went to the labour room and got all that done. During the night, I heard screaming women and crying babies.. soooo disturbing.. what to do, I was in one of the many labour rooms in the maternity wad... I could hardly sleep... with the constant interruption of my CTG monitoring and the screaming women.

The uterus calmed down after one hour on drip .. amazing! In the morning, the doc told me to stay another day for monitoring. So I was wheeled in bed to a 2 bedded room which was already occupied by a new mother. Again, sleep was elusive as the new born baby cried almost constantly and the husband of the women slept with her and snored all through the night. I definitely must have my own room when I deliver!

On Sat morn, doc was happy to let me go with strict instructions not to climb more than one or 2 flights of stairs in the day (the stairs in my house sud be ok) and must be on bed rest for a week. Sigh! So boring to be at home. But at least its home and not at the hospital where I chalked up RM1800 in terms of bills for just 2 nights. Wonder how bad it would be when I stay in a single room for up to one week.

I am still on medication - Terbutaine 2.5mg (Britaline) which made me vomit the last time I took it but thankfully I only feel a little strange now..and Augmentine.

Ooh... so tired now.. going to rest a bit before lunch. So glad I have a helper who is busy in the kitchen preparing lunch.

More updates later. Good thing the babies have not arrived.. I believe that the human incubator is much better than the hospital incubator. Babies are very active since the incident... I feel pulls and stretches so muc more now. Very uncomfortable. Well, doc did say that if I rest.. I sud keep them in there till week 37.

One more photo

2008-03-30T20:41:00.004+08:00

Now.. this photo is edited... wah! Look at my smooth face!! And don't u just think that I am crazy for putting Nimbus on the baby's cot. But he is like my baby!! BTW, this is my favourite maternity baju. very comfy...

I don't know why I look so short.. seriously I really look short. Must be the pose or something. Anyway, u probably can't see it well, but the baby baju have a rat/mouse on it.. symbolising the year of the rat in which my girls will be born... imagine being called Minnie.. kakaka!

I look at my belly now and cannot believe that they grew one inch more since the photo was taken.. so huge now. I think I may reach 46 inches and beat this really big guy in my office!

Weight breakdown in pregnancy

2008-03-30T16:57:00.002+08:00

Hmm.. I have put on 10 kgs now:
1) Babies are 1.8kgs each = 3.6kgs
2) Placenta are 0.9kg each = 1.8kgs
3) Amniotic fluid = 0.9kg
4) Extra Blood volume = 1.8kgs
5) Uterine enlargement = 0.9kg
6) Fluid in maternal tissue= 1.4kgs
7) Breast enlargement = 0.4kg
Total 10.8kgs

That seems about right. At least I am on track. Well .. I am supposed to put on one pound a week from now onwards or something like that. So let's eat more!! Yummy potato chips at my desk right now. And I ate a very calorie filled lunch today - pasta and fries. Delicious! Had McDonalds on Friday too. Crazy huh?

Another friend is preggie!

2008-03-30T16:20:00.001+08:00

What wonderful news I heard today over lunch. Another friend is preggers too. Hmmm... seems like I am surrounded by pregnant women ... great.. we can all swap ideas.. and aches and pains..

What a blessing to hear such good news.. and she is feeling well too. That is good to hear too. Having a good pregnancy makes it all the more enjoyable.

Last check up- 32 weeks

2008-03-29T12:15:00.004+08:00

I had minor contractions shown on my CTG in the last 2 check ups and were getting bigger in magnitude... that was a bad sign. I had the cell group praying for me on this.. and lo and behold.. the check up yesterday revealed a quiet uterus.. wonderful!

Babies are growing well (they were kinda stunted for 2 weeks) and now at 1.8kgs each. Doctor was beaming when he told me that I only need to hang on for 2 more weeks - till week 34 for them to be relatively safe to come out to the world without much special care.

Both girls were sort of in a standing position this round instead of their usual traverse selves. Oh dear, I have been knocking on one rather violently to stop her from causing that much pain at my ribs. Poor girl.. probably have been knocking on her head.. bad mummy!

Counting the days till 34th week. Hmmm.. another 8 days to reach exactly 34!

Stem Cells

2008-03-27T21:07:00.002+08:00

Today I had a chat with a person from Stem Life. Marido and I are considering to store our twins' cord blood for the future. This stem cell thingy has been going on for quite a few years in Malaysia now.

We are hoping that the stem cells in the blood will be able to help anyone in the family later who may need it for cancer, any degenerative disease, injury... etc.

It cost RM3000 to harvest for the twins but I think its worth it.

Hmmm... I wonder if any of my friends did go for this? No one has mentioned to me except for the Suwitos. Must be a very private thing, huh?

Water Retention

2008-03-26T20:18:00.002+08:00

Ok.. am at week 32 now and finally the water retention has started on the legs. My legs look strange... kinda like I packed on the pounds there. And it has started to feel numb occasionally too esp when i am sitting in the same position for too long. Today, whilst at Genji Restaurant enjoying yummy sashimi (ssh! I am not supposed to eat this but i had refrained for the last 8 months...), I felt that my legs were getting numb!

I have gotten used to the swollen v a g i n a thingy... as well as the pain that accompanies it when I walk. But it does get rather bad in the evening.

I am 60kgs now and have a waistline of 42 inches.... definitely beating Marido. Now I can proudly say to him to "Move over! Cos I am larger than you!" when we are in bed and he is hogging the space!

Babies are 1.7 kgs each (or sud be) and the placentas are about 1kg each too I think... that means I have about 4kgs plus of baby and material in here.. so so tiring to lug them around all the time. Getting in and out of bed is like moving a beached whale... bleck!

Pregnancy Shots- unedited

2008-03-18T21:43:00.005+08:00

My friend Fiona came by last Sat to shoot some photos of me in my huge glory. These shots are inspired by my friend Biow! So.. do I look big for 7 months of what? Can't imagine what the belly will look like in the next 2 months??? This is taken in my bedroom... look at the red scary wall paper!

I like this picture of Nimbus pressing against the belly. He looks like he is almost grumpy.. "Bleck! Don't like these twins... they are going to steal my mummy's love away from me"... No worries Nimbus, I will always Love you!!

Marido and I standing by the pool... at our apartment. No one around....

At the poolside chair with Marido. Kinda a nice intimate picture!

Taken at the garden at my apartment. Just love the lush greeness!

Eating

2008-03-18T21:41:00.000+08:00

I can't seem to eat much these days.. thus explaining my lack of weight increase. I try to eat chocolates and ice cream but the body does not seem to like them.. I get a funny, yucky feeling on the tongue after eating them. The same goes for fruit. The body seems to like bread.. or more specifically PIZZA! I have never eaten so much pizza in such a short span of time. Everytime Marido asked me what I would like to eat.. it's always the same answer.. PIZZA!

I think I do not have much space in the tummy anymore for food.. the acid seem to rise up the throat sometimes.. blegh! Yucky!! The babies are definitely squashing my internal organs. Sigh! Sometimes I am amazed that 3.5kgs of baby is in here... freaky! Can u believe it that by next month, i would have about 5 kgs of baby in here.... woah! Scary... Pant! Pant!

Sleep

2008-03-17T21:36:00.002+08:00

The pregnancy is tiring. I have to admit that I am in bed normally by 10pm every night.. whether or not I fall asleep is another matter. But the blessed me is able to drop everything at 10 and go off to dreamland. I have about a full 8 hours of sleep at least and most days, I have 9!

I start work at 8.45am and I am normally out of the house by 8am to make it in time. I get off work about 6.30pm and am normally home by 7.30pm for dinner. At 8.30pm, i take a shower and get on the net, read about babies and work stuff, play with Nimbus, chat with Marido, some light household chores. And then it's time to go to bed.

I think I am blessed indeed!

Sleeping.. well .. even though I get the 8-9 hour sleep, I normally wake up 3 times in the night to empty the bladder and by 6am, Nimbus is meowing his head off to get fed.. bad cat!! So the sleep is not that great quality but hey! It's better than less sleep.

A 9 or 10 month Pregnancy?

2008-03-17T21:30:00.002+08:00

I am a bit confused.... how do I measure my pregnancy in months? Well, most preggers count by weeks but that does not make sense to a non pregnant person who has no clue about pregnancy. Therefore I try to simplify by saying it in months.

Full term = 40 weeks
But if you divide 40 weeks by 4 (which is roughly one lunar month) then a person is pregnant for 10 freaking months!! That sounds very long and torturous. However, if we look at the normal gregorian month.. it has about 4.33 weeks. So depending on how I calculate it, I could be be (when I am at 31 weeks) :

Lunar month = almost 8 month (32 weeks being 8 month on the dot)
Gregorian month = 7 months (30.33 weeks being 7 month on the dot).

So which month is the right one for me to tell people?? Still confused. Well, I am been telling people that I am 7 months. Gee! Can't wait for the 8th month.

Anti Contraction Drugs

2008-03-15T23:11:00.002+08:00

I was given Terbutaine or Terbutaline 2.5mg (supposed to stop the minor contractions) which causes me to throw up. So far, I have thrown up about 3 times today... once at 5am (after eating some noodles cos I was so hungry), felt nauseous all day, threw up again at about 5pm... and again at 7.30pm... and now that its 11pm.. I think I will just pop over to the toilet to have another round of retching.... yuck!

My gynae assured me that the medication will normally cause palpitations but when I read the internet, nausea and vomiting is also a side effect... I also feel really tired.. probably due to the vomiting too. I think I am going to stop eating this pills... its a very yucky feeling to be throwing up. Sigh!

Maybe my minor contractions are truly minor and normal in this part of the 3rd trimester. Anyway, going for another CTG next week. See whether the contractions are stronger or not. If not, great....no harm in stopping the medication.

Gynae comments

2008-03-14T19:57:00.002+08:00

I am almost 31 weeks now and weigh abt 57.5kgs.. no change last week and this week....yicks. And I had another cardiotocograph and it showed that I have minor contractions. So I have to eat medication for 2 weeks to slow down the contractions.

Hmmm... so other than the swollen v a g i n a and hemorrhoids, all is ok.

You know.. people say that they always wanted twins.. and I am so lucky to have them... well I guess I am but it comes with a price... they are just too heavy for me now. If I count them, they are 1.5kgs each and an extra placenta is about 500gs.. so I have about 3.5kgs worth of baby material not including the amniotic fluid which I think must weigh a lot! Don't u think that by 3.5kgs.. the mother is ready to pop!?

Heavy, heavy!

Hmmm.. I had a bad dream one night where I gave birth to 4 babies - 3 boys and 1 girl and they all died. When I woke up that morning, Nimbus quickly walked up to me and slept on my tummy to comfort me. How the heck did he know that I just had a bad dream? The last time he did that was when I threw up 20 times a day. What a wonder my cat is!

More pain

2008-03-12T21:03:00.002+08:00

Today, i felt even more pain then ever at my pubic bone area and by end of the day, it was already swollen. Sad! This is probably due to the fact that I had a meeting with Sunway yesterday and had to walk a distance to reach the office from the car park and then back to the car park. Also I had to walk from the carpark at the Curve to Colonial Times for dinner... that was a long walk in this condition.

I left work half an hour earlier... gee! Sud have left earlier. But nevermind.. see how I feel tomorrow.

Amidst the news of elections

2008-03-10T21:45:00.002+08:00

I guess my pregnancy is still getting on despite me wanting to take a break from it and concentrate on the historic moment of Malaysian's political scene. We just had the elections on March 8 and I think that Malaysians in general were in shock at how far the opposition managed to take on Barisan National.

So back to my pregnancy - last night I developed some rectal bleeding and also the restless leg syndrome.... great! I could hardly sleep and am feeling rather exhausted now. Hopefully I won't have much problems tonight. According to Babycentre.com -This RLS is this an uncontrollable urge to move around in bed to relieve crawling, tingling, or burning sensations deep inside your legs.. Some researchers estimate that up to 20 percent of pregnant women develop this problem during the last few months of pregnancy, though others believe it's much less common than that.
This symptoms is normally noticed when you're at rest, especially right before you fall asleep or when sitting still for long periods, such as at the movies or during long car rides. Most of the time, you'll feel it in your legs, but some women experience it in their arms as well.

Moving the limbs brings immediate relief, but unfortunately, it's only temporary. As soon as you sit or lie down, the sensations return. Your restless legs may even be waking you up once you're asleep.

Dang! I wonder if there is anything more that is coming up!?? Horrors!

Anyway.. am 30 weeks now.. Babies are 1.3kgs now.. yippee! And measuring about 38cm...

Another 3 weeks to go before they are almost safe to come out. Then they will be about 2kgs (hopefully)

CTG

2008-03-09T21:15:00.001+08:00

I had a CTG (cardiotocograph) done last week where the doctor wanted to check if my womb was about to have contractions. 1 small device was strapped to my abdomen with soft belt- it measures the intensity and duration of contraction. Fortunately, my womb was restful. I am now at 30 weeks tomorrow. So I will visit the doctor again next week to check again for this. This is becos if the babies decide to come out in less than 32 weeks.. they will have trouble surviving without having defects. So that means another 2 weeks to go!

"Your pregnancy- week by week" by Lesley Regan was enlightening. She herself is a medical doctor who had twins at 33 weeks gestation! The babies had no complications but had to be in the special care ward for a month. That I think is rather scary too!

Marido sud be back from his business trip this week. I would be happy to welcome him home. It had been rather tiring being all by myself (with Nimbus for company). It would be nice to have the hubby back again.

Gynae says...

2008-03-05T22:05:00.002+08:00

My pain in the groin cannot be helped unless I am willing to take Panadol or take time off work. He recommends that if there is swelling, I sud take time off work for a day and go back to work the next. I am not abt to do that since I am having too good a time at work!

Did I mention that 100% of the married women in my dept is pregnant... so keng, right?

NTT- Nusa Tenggara Timur

2008-03-05T22:00:00.002+08:00

Ah! I finally figured out that Debbie is not from Entiti but from NTT- Nusa Tenggara Timur... I was telling Marido and suddenly I remembered that it may be NTT. So here is the map. It's a cluster of islands on the right of Bali.

Debbie is not around for me to ask which island she is from. Wl update later!

Maid arrival

2008-03-03T20:28:00.002+08:00

Today I had a call from my maid agency. My maid has arrived. Funny how I was just blogging about that and telling Goat that she has not arrived yet and here she is.

Debbie is about 5 feet tall and looks about 50kgs. She has a great smile.. with dimples. Her Bahasa is good... fortunately for me!! After I took her from the agency, I passed her to my sister for cooking and cleaning training. Esp the cooking bit! I will only put her in my home permanently when the twins arrive.

Debbie says that she is from an island called Entiti.. but I could not find it on the map of Indonesia. She mentioned that it took her one week by ferry to arrive to Jakarta and if by plane.. it's about 4 hour flight.. on a Air Asia type of plane. Must be really far.

She is the 5th of 7 siblings. Her father is a furniture maker and her mum is a penenun... a weaver. She is married with one son who is now 1.5 years old and is taken care by her mother in law. What drove her here is obviously to earn money. If she stayed back in her hometown to do some teaching.. she would only get RM150 per month. Here in Malaysia, she get more than 3 times that. I guess it's like the many people who keep wanting to migrate to get better pay or better opportunity. Hmmm.. at the end of her 2 years here.. she would have saved enough to relax for the next 5 years.

I was very glad that she told me that she likes cats. Nimbus will have no problems with her then. Hopefully that boy will not decide to adore her instead of me.. i would be so sad!

The 7th Month

2008-03-01T21:49:00.003+08:00

I am now finally in the 3rd trimester! With the start of this trimester last week at 28 weeks, it brought new aches and pains to the body. My leg cramps have increased to almost once or twice a night. Both legs are aching now as I blog this. Also, I have this persistent pain on my right side of the tummy... maybe it's one of the babies in that position.

Not only that, I have started feeling shooting pains in my groin area when I stand up and start walking. Due to this, I have been walking really slowly... much to my own irritation. Staying in the apt where I have to walk from my car to the lift, then the lift to another lift quite a distance away. This pain apparently is common to women who are late in their pregnancy and who are about to deliver. When I got that pain last thursday, I went to see a GP who told me that I looked like I was 8 months pregnant! Actually, to think about it.. I do have 2 babies who weight 1 kg each and therefore having 2 kgs of babies and about 1kg of placenta surely makes me look like 8-9 month pregnant. The pain could be symphysis pubis dysfunction where the stiff joint near my groin area start to move a bit too much due to the weight of the babies. This causes pain and inflammation and may progress to a more severe condition of intense pain when the joint loosen and creates a gap.... gasp!

My ears are becoming blocked again and I keep looking at my feet to see any signs of swelling. So far, I only have the above problems. Sometimes I wish that the babies can come out soon but if they do, surely they will have a hard time surviving since they are so small and not fully developed.

My gynae wants to monitor me every 2 weeks and also check for possibility of contractions via a fetal monitor belt. Well, next check up is on Tuesday.

The maid has not arrived yet... scary! When will she arrive? I have waited 5 months and according to the agency, she is to come mid march (they actually said that she is to arrive after CNY but it took longer than normal).

I found a baby sitter too but the distance in Bandar Utama is quite a turn off but the alternative is Kota damansara... yicks... worse!

Weight and waistline

2008-03-01T21:47:00.003+08:00

View of Beaches

2008-02-24T21:45:00.004+08:00

This is like a picture of a postcard, right? I took it in Maldives.
This picture was published in the local paper in Queensland. Picture taken by Marido on Burleigh Beach.

My Tadpoles

2008-02-16T21:16:00.003+08:00

Since I am a frog.. it would make sense to call my 2 growing buns the in the oven... tadpoles... tho i don't think that tadpoles like being in ovens...

They have been steadily growing... and squirming around the limited space in my womb. Tell you what.. i actually feel like my body has been invaded by aliens. They move around and push here and there.. constantly reminding me of their presence. It's a good thing... them moving around.. but the feeling is quite out of this world... either like you have constant diarrhoea or u swallowed a live fish and it is swimming inside you. Queer Queer!

I have been reading about twins coming out earlier.. normally they come out about 3 weeks earlier. However.. some unfortunate cases in KL- one came out 2 months earlier.... at 32 weeks and the other I read about today came out at 31 weeks.. gosh I am almost at 27 weeks.. yicks! That is like another 4 weeks.

I plan to take photos of my growing bump at 31 weeks.. since this may be my only pregnancy... according to hubby. I am getting my friend Fiona to come over to my home to take shots of me in March. I hope it will turn out good. Hmm.. the bump is quite large... I think I look like a 7 month-er according to my sister. Fiona insisted that I take the photos as late as possible so that the bump will look 'nice and huge'... hopefully without stretch marks.

Ah! Tadpoles... u won't be swimming around for much longer.... but Mummy hopes that you will stay as long as possible and that you will not need me to go for caesarean.

Writing of caesarean,... i have not had a good experience with my gynaes.. the first one whom i liked got transfered to JB, then I had a doctor that spoke like Donald Duck twice in a row... then I switched to another which told me that he is not keen on natural birth and that I won't have enough milk to breastfeed my twins... would you believe that nasty doctor!! Or am i being too judgemental??

I decided that I will seek a 2nd opinion. Going to Damansara Specialist Hospital to visit my original gynae that told me to keep trying for a baby naturally (as mentioned in my earlier post). Hope the meeting will turn out good!

Baby - another one!!

2008-02-12T22:48:00.001+08:00

My graduation

2008-02-03T22:03:00.000+08:00

Marido and I graduated on the 26th Jan (Australia day) in our beautiful Nottingham University Campus in Semenyih. Whoohoo! It was really lovely that we could celebrate this momentous occasion together... another memory we are making!

The ceremony kinda reminded me of something out of Harry Potter..;)

Buying prams

2008-02-03T18:43:00.000+08:00

Sheesh! I did not realise that it was so hard to choose a pram. Here were my options :

Brand, Model, Price, Includes, Weight
Peg Perego, Pliko P3, RM2299, pram plus car seat carrier, 8kgs without car carrier
Maclaren, Techno XLR, RM1799, pram only, 7.8kgs without car carrier
Combi, 5 way stroller, RM2299 , pram plus car seat carrier, 4.2kg without car carrier

All the strollers/prams could recline about 170 degrees (not fully but good enough. I was really in favour of the lightweight Combi (Japanese) strollers but Marido found that he had to hunch down to push the pram and he kept on kicking it too. I was also keen on the Maclaren but after bringing my sister along, she noticed that the padding on the Maclaren was too thin and not suitable for newborns which needed more comfortable surroundings. So, I got the P3 in the end. Heavy but let's hope it will be useful and hardy for travelling.

Weight and waistline

2008-02-02T14:41:00.001+08:00

Driving to work

2008-01-10T09:21:00.000+08:00

I have started driving to work starting Jan.

Surprisingly, it was not as hard as I thought. Altho I do have doubts about the sudden cramps in the legs that I get and therefore I might crash the car…. But generally, the drive (half hour to and one hour back) is still manageable. However, I never had to go through one hour drive back in my previous job (sob! It was only 10 mins). Traffic in PJ/KL is bad….

Work! There are 2 obvious camps. When I am with one…. The other get suspicious and when I with the other, the first one wonders if they sud be telling me things in case I report it to the 2^nd. Sigh! What a disunited group! Never had this problem before.

Marido has been away for the whole week. I was actually quite apprehensive about him going off and leaving me behind cos I tend to feel a little ill after work and may need to be ferried around for food. Fortunately, this week was great. I managed to have dinner with good friends and with great food! What a treat! I tried this organic shop called Organic Café at Bangunan Siti Hasmah at Tmn Tun near Kiara walk. Pretty good.

Greeting the new year

2008-01-06T21:43:00.000+08:00

I woke up on New Year's Day and proceeded to eat a piece of fruit cake from the fridge. Festive mah! Then half an hour later, I was found throwing up in the toilet. That ruined the rest of the day for me… I was feeling lousy all day. What a great way to start the year. Imagine.. at 20 weeks pregnant, I was still throwing up. 2 days later, after lunch with my colleagues (I am not sure whether it was the warm temperature at the hawker shop or the oily char kuey teow or the ‘juicy’ piece of information I found out about my boss) I promptly threw up everything down the toilet bowl in the office. Then I proceeded to throw up whatever water I tried to drink. By 6pm, I was ready to faint. What a day.

Also, while in meetings, when the room is stuffy, I find myself drifting away… It never used to be this way. I must be psycho for starting a new job when I am pregnant. But I am still very very blessed to be able to get the job. So I shall persevere. And.. ooh! I just found out that I am going to handle a new promising project.

Gaining weight

2008-01-05T22:56:00.000+08:00

On the recent visit to the gynae on the 2nd Jan (on my 20 week), I noticed that my weight was about 52kgs... which mean that from the 4th month onward (ie when I started work), i gained one kg a week... wowee! If this keeps up, by the time i reach 40 weeks, i wud have gained another 20kgs thus being 72kg... totally unacceptable!

I doubt that i will last until week 40. Very likely I deliver before week 37 (since I am having twins and hence there is not much space for them anymore).

The 20 week scan took one hour by the sonographer. Babies look fine and healthy as detailed by the expert. Also, I found out that that they are hamburgers... (not hotdogs). Yup! 2 girls. I do feel that my mission seems not completed without a boy. After all, Marido already has a girl so these 2 girls don't seem that special anymore. Sigh! I sud be happy though but I can't help feeling a little disappointed.

My 2nd day at work

2007-12-04T21:17:00.000+08:00

Today is Tuesday.. my second day at work. So far so good but yesterday I was in near hysterics. Being pregnant certainly makes you more of a chicken than ever. Driving around seems like a chore and so I got Marido to send me to the office in PJ at 8 in the morning and we got there at 8.30am.. not much traffic as its school holidays. I was dreading the cab ride that I foresee i will be taking as my actual office for the next month is in KL. The entire dept is due to move to PJ but since renovations would take some time, I was to be stationed at KL after meeting my superior yesterday morning.

Then the boss told me that I have a training session for several days in a hotel and so he dropped me off at the hotel (so nice of him). At the end of the day.. 6pm.. of the training, my bum was aching and I felt rather ill. How am I supposed to get on tomorrow.. i wondered.. is going back to work a psycho thing to do? I was exhausted at the end of the day. Marido figured out that this was probably the most exhausting day in the last 4 months that I was pregnant and not working!

Well, this morning, I found it so hard to crawl out of bed even though I went to bed at 10.30pm the night before. Marido drove me to work today.... I was like a stoned person until I reached KL. Fortunately, by the time training started, I was not feeling as bad as yesterday.. altho the bum is still aching from sitting for so long... well.. I think all preggie women experience that!

More to blog later I hope about my work adventure!

Decision to rejoin the workforce

2007-12-04T21:15:00.001+08:00

When I announced to my friends about my decision to rejoin the workforce 2 months ago.. I was just surprised by how much people cared about me. I had so many opinions given to me (all which were valid and honest) that I got a bit confused about that decision to go back to work.

Many people said that they would quit work immediately upon hearing that they have twins. You know.. twins... higher risk blah. However.. none of these women were mengangguring for the last 6 months or had invest quite a large sum of money on a post graduate education a year before that.

I do know that twins carry a higher amount of risk but according to medical books... the risk are not that much higher than a singleton. The mother-to-be may be a little more exhausted than a singleton carrying mum but it does not mean that the mum cannot work. I don't deny that i will have a harder time than most people. Well.. in the end.. the decision to go back to work is a mix of so many things that I have weighted. However, if by the end of this month and I am still not over the vomitting.. I shall concede defeat and give up the job. In the meantime.. I am excited about going back to work. That put a smile on my face (other than when I found out I was carrying twins).

Here's to a successful venture! And happy twins!

Baby Jared

2007-11-12T13:00:00.002+08:00

Hyperemesis Gravidarum

2007-11-04T08:34:00.001+08:00

I suspect that I had this! What is it? According to "What to Expect when you are Expecting- 3rd Ed", HG is an exaggerated from of morning sickness, characterized by excessive vomitting, which probably occurs in fewer than 1 in 200 pregnancies. It is more common in first-tim mums, young mums, obese women, multiple carrying mums.

I seem to have all the signs and symptoms for it.
1) Nausea and vomiting of early pregnancy is unusually frequent and severe (it may be almost impossible to keep anything down)
2) Infrequent urination and urine that is dark yellow (signs of dehydration from loss of fluids thru vomiting) *my urine looked like orange juice... seriously!
3) Weight loss of greater than 5% or original body weight *mine is 10%
4) Blood in the vomited material *yeck!

Fortunately my practitioner did not ask me to grin and bear it....like my sister's doctor. I was prescribed medication that helped quell the nausea so that I did not vomit as much. The doctor also told me to quit eating all vitamins as the iron in them made it worse. I was advised to eat only things that I could stomach... which in my case was all the horribly unhealthy food which I never like eating like potato chips, bread, porridge and biscuits... blek! But somehow my body accepted it more than fruits or vegetables.

I am pregnant with twins!

2007-10-31T22:21:00.000+08:00

It's official. I have twins!....And I have lost 10 percent of my body weight due to the 'all day sickness' in the last 7 weeks. I am now at about 45kgs (considering i am supposed to have put on 3kgs by the 3rd trimester... this is terrible! But doctor assures me that this is normal with people who have twins).

I have noticed that my eyesight is going too.. probably due to dehydration. Not too severe.. I still go to the toilet once in while but this is the first time, this leaky bladder person has gotten up in the morning and does not go the toilet to urinate. Most of the time, before I end up in bed at night, I spent a lot of time throwing up whenever i ate or drank 2 hours prior to that... so guess not that much fluid stays in. And everytime I drink, I will throw up... yucks! Plain water has become such a torture to drink.. and I used to only drink plain water. Now, all my drinks have to be laced with sugar... Ribena being my favourite!

I wished someone had insisted that I cut my hair short the moment i got pregnant. Now, with the debilitating nausea and vomiting, I have hardly any energy to shower or wash my back length hair. What a torture. The moment my nausea lifts, I am going to chop it off (as much as I dare without incuring Hubby's delicate sensibilities about my lovely locks).

Many times, I feel like crying.. and sometimes.. actually about 3-4 times I did... the vomitting is so painful and heart wrenching. Going through the violent reaction of the body heaving up and down during a throwing up session reminds me of dying. And also like running a 100m sprint at each chuck-up. I feel so breathless and most times I just collapse on the toilet floor trying to regain my breath. Sometimes I am so helpless that all I can do is pray. Oh God, please take this cup away from me... yet not my will but yours be done!

Don't get me wrong.. I am happy with this pregnancy.. and the happy twins. It's just that I had not imagined the morning sickness to be so bad. My gynae reassures me that this is normal for a twin carrier and has prescribed 3 types of antiemetic and antacid for me (Maxolon, Citamedine and Milk of Magnesia). Somedays, I am good without throwing up but the nausea is there which prevents me from eating much except rather plain porridge, salty wheat crackers and an occasional half cup of Milo (even that.. my body rejects the milk in the Milo). Other days, even with the antiemetic, I still throw up like no tomorrow.

I had decided to get help from the doctor when one day, I had 10 sessions of throwing up in my 8 week. Then even with the medication, in my middle of the 9th week, I had 20 sessions of chuck-up. It was truly very horrifying to see blood in my vomit and feel the pain in my chest or whatever part that was engaged in the vomiting. I suppose, I would have been superwoman to not have cried during this time. I must however attribute my fortitude to the fact that I was not working and need not feel mega guilty about not being able to give my best to my work.

I thank God daily for allowing me the luxury of not working in this stressful time of my life. God.. U know how much I can bear.... thank you for carrying my cross!