Monday, April 18, 2005

I am 'workless'

Well, I have just spent my first week of not working. So far, it has been good. But I keep getting withdrawal symptoms.. little panic attacks that stuff are going wrong in the brands that I used to handle and true enough when I checked with my ex-colleagues, there are many things that is rather messy. Other panic attacks like "oh no.. I am not longer working and contributing to society.. will my brains start to be degenerate.. you know stuff like that. However the good things are that Marido remarks that I am nicer than I used to be. I am gentler and less prone to snappishness. I must admit that when I am stressed and working from 8am to 9pm each night (and weekends too), you do get a bit grumpy. Your life is already stretched that tight that another tension will make you burst.

My work was almost my life.. me the Business Manager of a multinational Swiss Company. Getting to travel and stay in beautiful hotels eg Sutra Harbour in KK (sorrylah.. i only do domestic flights). Presentations to MDs of companies... you know, stuff that makes you feel puffily important and recognised. After giving up my identity (which really was so tied up with my work/job that I was so scared to resign) I am coming to terms with myself and the person that has God as my identity. What more can I ask for? I am the child of the Most High God.. what a zinger!! So here I am planning weird stuff like studying on investments, finishing up my bead work (traditional nyonya shoes - I will finish this by end April -YES!), making jewelry out of the very expensive but absolutely gorgeous Swarovski Crystals, horse riding (it's a dream anyway), cooking (hah! ) and catching up with my old and young pals, applying for my Masters Programme etc.

I hope to come to terms with not working soon. Marido is very interested in making me into a new product... I think he secretly is doing a makeover on my perspective of life. He thinks that I have a very warped view of life.. too paranoid on too many things..... Life is straightforward.. if it hands you lemons.. go make lemonade (as what Spot says).

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