A monologue for an audition

I had this big Siamese cat named Nimbus, who came and went as he pleased. One day he went out and didn't come back. Days went by, and I went up and down the corridors of the apartment, calling, "Nimbus, Nimbus!" I put up signs and knocked on doors and stopped my neighbours,--"Have you seen a big Siamese cat?"

I was very very sad all the time—oh how l loved this cat! He was cuddly and loved to be cuddled. He followed me around like a shadow as if he was a dog. He was hardly silent, he chatted to me during the day, waked me up in the morning with his meowy alarm clock voice and broomed like a bike whenever he ran down the stairs. He loved being petted and he greeted me every time I walk thru the front door. Many nights I had slept holding on to his 2 small furry paws.. bliss!

After more than a week of frantic looking and calling my husband said, "Maybe we should go for a walk downstairs at the lobby and asked the security guards if they have seen him”. We were talking loudly at the lobby when I suddenly heard a frantic meow and saw a cream and brown ball hurtling towards me! Oh Nimbus Nimbus.. I was almost in tears of happiness.

No more running away boy! I was so thrilled for him to be home and he never wander far away after that.

Hand Foot and Mouth Disease

Poor Eggy had fever last Friday and did not want to eat or drink any milk unless its from my breast directly. So I had to just let her drink milk for 2 days. On Sunday, I saw some red spots on her feet and on her bottom. I quickly sent her to the polyclinic nearby. The doctor there cud not confirm whether she had HFMD (which I suspected). He also did not take her temperature, nor opened her clothes to examine her body ... sheesh! He then gave her medicine for allergy (was there an allergic reaction??) and antibiotics (but babies sud not be given antiobiotics unless its very very critical!!). I just wrote him off as a very lousy doctor!

The next day, I took her to Damansara Specialist Hospital to see Dr Vasantha... immediately she diagnosed that it was HFMD by looking at the spots and checking her genitalia. She gave a pain numbing throat medication which must be given 30 mins before eating so that the pain will be gone to enable the child to eat, some Cataflam for the fever, Daktarin oral gel (treats fungal and bacterial infection). After a day of treatment, Eggy looked much better and by the next day, she could eat without relying on the pain numbing medication.

Doc said that she will take about 4 days to return to her usual self. So today, Wednesday, she is back to eating her normal portion... yay!

On the other hand, Cookie had high fever last night with axillary (armpit) temperature of 38.3 C which is considered high. Even with paracetamol, her fever refused to subside. I took her to the A+E at 11pm (dang! Marido is not in the country again!) The doctor told me that there is nothing much he can do cos I had already given the paracetamol at 9.45 and I sud not give another dose for another 4 hours (to prevent liver damage). So I had to sponge her when I got back and she went off to sleep. At 5am, she woke up warmish again and after her medication and sponging, she drifted off to sleep again.

This morning, i checked her throat and saw white dots.. sigh.. she caught the HFMD...so another round again. My hope is that neither my maid or I will catch it. I suppose we will know on Thursday or Friday.

p/s HFMD is not dangerous at all.. however I remembered that about 10 children died in Kuching some time ago of this. Probably because they cannot eat or drink due to pain and so they actually die of dehydration.

p/s 2 : I am definitely blessed that I dun have to worry about the big bill caused by this ... as it is.. it is almost the same amount as my sister's family get to claim for one year in her hubby's sorry organisation!

Call me Mem

My kids have taken to calling me "Mem"... wait a minute.....actually only Eggy calls me that. Cookie has not articulated anything resembling mum or ma.. or even pa.. while Eggy is busy with papapapa and mem mem mum mum. But in terms of activity, Cookie has started pointing a week ago.. in her 10th month. She also looks set to start walking.

Bookwise, Cookie is so interested in books and will sit still as I read her a book or two. Eggy.. lets just say that after a page or two, she would prefer to eat the book!

It also seems that Eggy is taller than her sibling and loves to torture her by beating her... poor Cooks! She just sits there and cry away.. of course Mem comes to rescue her!

Nimbus gets eaten by Eggy too! When she sees him from a distance, she would start crawling very fast towards him. After grabbing him violently, she would proceed to gnaw at his ears.. poor chap! He does not like it very much and would bite her and scratch her in return... serves her right... I dun interfere as I think that older babies sud realise that animals should not be grabbed and bitten.

Cookie is rather gentle with him. And so Nimbus would content to sit next to her and let her carress him. What a lovely picture!

Some black and white shots

Cookie looking pleased as she managed to get the ice-cream stick!


Eggy with a farnee face!


Cookie playing with "Mem"


Eggy looking like my friend Lawrence who has a bald head too!

The new Nicole Kidman

Lottie at her 12th year formal.. that's what they call the prom in Australia. So grown up, yes? And such a lovely dress... may I borrow it? Kakaka! I can't even fit in it!

Cookie on the walker

Cookie is 10 months in this and she can't stop walking with the walker.. she just goes on and on like an energiser bunny... but so farnee....

Eggy is quite reluctant to walk with the walker.. she prefers to stand and just hold on to it.

CNY and Christmas pix

Mummy and Cookie

Cacat mummy and Eggy.

My in laws and the bubs.

Uncle Tim and Eggy (i think that she looks like him!)

Marido and his 4 girls! Where is my boy?? Poor chap.. he was left behind in Malaysia to be tortured by Elyon!

5 tips to living longer

I have been watching this fab show during my ‘stint’ in Brisbane recently. While feeding my kids at 9.30am, I get to watch “What’s Good for You!’. There are many questions tackled during the one hour show. Today, I thought to just let you know about living longer.


1. Optimism – if you are the type that sees the glass to be half full.. you may just live longer than those who see it as half empty. How to get optimistic.. according to studies, you can do meditation, pray, retrain your mind…

2. Exercise – but of course, we know this already… but what we don’t know is that it’s not just the physical exercise.. mental ones are important too. So.. a half hour exercise of walking a day is ideal and an hour of shopping is even better… u get to exercise the body and the mind (by choosing and looking at interesting things).. what a great shocker for the wallet!!)

3. Eat well – what do you know… eating well… is my diet of bak-kut the every morning good? Hmm.. the Mediterranean diet is supposedly great… vino, pasta, tomatoes…plenty of antioxidants.

4. Friends – have more friends.. good friends apparently prolong your life… it’s not that family is not important but me thinks that family can create stress as you are stuck with them! (all u family who are reading this…what do you think?). Family can stave off the disability among the elderly tho according to studies which I cant verify cos I only caught bits and pieces of the show.

5. Getting married – sorry folks.. this only applies to men. Apparently men add 7 years to their lives by marrying cos of the element of care and concern given by their mates. Unfortunately for women… all that caring and giving takes years away from you as studies show that single women live longer than married ones… ok.. I better take some time off for rest and relaxation once in a while to ensure that I live long enough to continue to care for the hubby! An interesting note to add – if the man surrounds himself with women, he will live longer…. *dionngz* what does this mean.. he sud have loads of girl friends… well I think the studies only confined it to children. Men add 74 weeks to their lives for every daughter they have… hmmm… hubby will add 4 years to his life with our 3 girls! Women get 95 weeks for every kid regardless of gender! Does that mean that women are less bias about children gender?? Anyway, I wonder if this is true for asian cultures which ‘worship’ the male child!

Stories about my maid

1) One of the days my cell leader called me up to ask me to facilitate the group. I agreed without realising that I did not copy the notes for last week's message by Pastor Daniel. I was leafing through my notes and to my dismay found out that I did not copy anything. I was lamenting to my maid about that and she coolly took her own notes and passed them to me! I was astonished.. how did she managed to take care of the babes during Sunday celebration in church and have time and inclination to take notes (in English too!)

2) I was shopping in Bandar Utama at the URS store for shoes. I was trying on some and my maid gave comments and urged me to buy a pair that she likes. I bought the slippers and had good comments from my Hermana, Marido and Cunada too! My maid has good taste! Sometimes she would comment on my clothes and say that I am underdressed for the occasion.. can u believe that?

3)My maid came to Malaysia with no knowledge of Malaysian cooking styles.. within 6 months, she was cooking nyonya, malay, chinese and indian dishes... yummy!! Eg of what she does.. delicious old cucumber soup, ayam sioh, ayam dry curry, ayam rendang, yam rice with bak kut teh, ayam masak merah, bbq pork ribs, all sorts of veges, steamed fish with ginger and tomato, etc etc I must say that when I passed her the recipe books, I did not expect such excellence! Now I have bought her a mixer so that she can bake cakes too! More of that after CNY since I will be in Australia from Xmas till CNY. Anyway, I have told her that she better be a chef when she gets back to Indonesia... what a waste of talents otherwise!!

4) My maid loves my cat as much as I do.. she has also started giving him a smooch every day now in the morning... kakaakaka! But I only allow her to bathe kids but not the cat! The cat's bath is my job!

5) My maid is famous in my apartment. Almost everyone who gets to know me will tell me that they have seen her around wheeling the kids for a walk or to play in the pool. I think she enjoys the attention she gets wheeling the twins around... people actually stop her to chat to her.. how many maids can claim that the neighbours are friendly and chat to them!?

6) My maid is truly acting like my housekeeper and my time keeper.. just today, i was due for a Xmas party at 6.30pm. At 6pm, she told me that I had to stop talking to my kid (eldest daughter- 16) and had to pump milk and go off! Housekeeper? Oh.. she is very houseproud and will lament "Oh my house is so messy.. I best go and clean up now!"

Even More Twin Pix

Grrr...This is Eggy looking upset cos Cookie has her hand on her butt! Doesn't Eggy look like a little duck?


Hmm.. I find this photo hilarious! They are on their high chair waiting for breakfast! They are on 2 solid meals a day.. can be 3 but I am too lazy.. or rather I am waiting for them to grow up a bit more!



Swimming in the pool.. I started them at the pool since they were 5 months old. They love it! But these days it's been raining cats and cats... and more cats... and so they have been moping at home.. together with my cat! Poor darling.. my cat i mean!

Esteve, Ashton, Hofma and Takamine

These are not names of the men I love! However, it must be names of men before they put it on their beloved guitars. Ahem... if they were men.. I would be mostl likely interested in Esteve.. Spanish mah! I was looking at these guitars in a shop today and managed to get all the prices and heard them being played... of course the best was the most expensive out of these brands- the Esteve.. the problem is that there is no website that talked about the model I am looking at the Esteve 3G163 I did find a french website said that it's a child guitar... ???

Well, the guitar sang.. it had a beautiful voice. But I better check out other Spanish guitars before I decide!

Why do I want a guitar.. well I got fed up of not getting the right chords during my song leading at cell group.. when u don't get the right notes, u either end up screeching like a wild cat or bellowing like a bull. Both are not great for being making a joyful and nice noise!

Fraternal Twins

You know, people tell me that they cannot differentiate between my 2 girls. Even my sister has trouble sometimes. Well, I guess that it must be hard if u have just seen the girls.. cos they are both almost 6.5kgs at 6 months and are also about the same height and have the same head circumference!

But to me that is where the similarity ends. Here are some examples of how they differ.

Cookie	Eggy
Olive complexion	Fair complexion
Soulful eyes	Oriental eyes
Curled lashes (mascara)	Straight lashes
Smiles with great delight	Smiles shyly
Mummy's nose	Daddy's nose
Shouts	Screeches

Some behavioural differences. Cookie has started crawling.. or rather creeping at 4 months and so now, she is all over the place knocking her head on so many things that got in her way. She also seems to want to grab anything and she will keep trying by crawling right towards the thing and screaming her head off when she is blocked by some obstacle. She also bulldozes past things (even going on top of Eggy) to reach her goal. Eggy seems contented to just stay at the same position (developmentally she seems about 2 months behind even though they are only 2 mins apart- but all babies develop differently ;) ) Sometimes when Eggy pushes her head up and she finds that she cannot stay up long, she would just collapse with her head sideways on the mat (rather violently too!) and when she gets tired with too much pushing her head up, she would giggle by herself and smile before giving up!

Cookie Cutting her first tooth

OOh.. Cookie cut her first tooth yesterday.. that would explain why she was kinda out of sorts these days.. a bit grumpy and refusing to feed. Hmmm.. so is Eggy actually.. so she won't be far behind. They just turned 6 months!

They have started on rice cereal with mummy's milk and they have been at it for the last 3 weeks. After 3 weeks, they have finally finish the cereal with relish. Time to start them on rice porridge next week.. after my financial exams on Monday and Thursday.

I am still pumping away for them. I produce about 250ml++ per pump and I pump 6x a day.. so that works out to be more than 1.5 liters per day or actually close to 2 liters. That is a far cry from my initial days of only 60ml or less per pump. All the hard work of diligently pumping every 3-4 hours (even during the night!) paid off. And I also stay at the pump for at least half and hour. What a cow!! So this cow is able to feed her babies fully on her own milk... ;).

More twins pix

I love this photo of my twins.. they look as tho they were planning something farnee and are laughing or snickering about it.



Cookie looks like she's gonna do the joget... and Eggy looks horrified at that thought! Both wearing hand-me-downs from their cousin Elysia.


This was taken at Sepang Goldcoast. It's such a gorgeous place. My twins in animal clothings... given of course by someone.... I did not buy them!

And look at the chalets behind us. The chalets go out until 2km into the sea!

Itty Bitty Baby Girls.. er Boy

I was listening to the baby lullaby type of song titled "Itty Bitty Baby Girl" but I can't help singing it as

Itty Bitty Baby Boy
Daddy's pride and Mummy's Joy
Tiny treasure so petite
But great is the joy that you bring
To your daddy and me

Our love for you
Will only grow stronger each day
For yes, it's true
You've stolen our hearts away
And my little boy
You're just the right size today
To hold in my arms
To look in your eyes and say

Sigh! What a sweet boy!

Video of the Cookie and the Egg (m&m)

The Egg fell at Sepang Goldcoast

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king's horses and all the king's men
Couldn't put Humpty together again.

In my case it was:

Humpty Dumpty laid in her pram
Humpty Dumpty fell- head hit the land
Papa picked her up and prayed she'd be fine
Praise God, she only cried... no cracks no lines!

We were at Sepang Goldcoast on the 30th Aug on Saturday for a meal with some good friends (one who is in charge of the development of this gorgeous place). We were to have a meal on the deck by the sea. Unfortunately the deck only had stairs up and so we had to lift the pram up. When my maid and Marido was trying to do so, my maid accidentally lifted her front of the pram without realising that Marido was not holding on the back of the pram and it fell backwards with Eggy slipping out of the pram head down and dropping like an egg on the concrete floor! Aiiii! My heart almost stopped! I thought that she may have broken her neck in that fall.

However, Marido picked her up immediately and just prayed for her. My maid for so distraught that she started crying. I was surprisingly calm. After crying piteously for abt 15 mins, Eggy calmed down and seemed fine after that. I thought that her head a bit senget after that but when I checked with her paed 2 days later, he assured me that it was ok.

Optimistic!

I saw this on a door in my 2nd office:-

Soldier : Sir.. we are completely surrounded!!
Commander : Excellent! Then we can shoot from any side.

Are they boys?

That is the question I keep getting everytime I go out with them... even though they are wearing dresses. I guess that the bald heads certainly makes them look like baby boys. Sigh!

Anyway, don't they look farnee??? So hilarious. I better get a shot of them crying.. it's very very farnee.. really!

Cookie and Eggy

Was at Avillion and decided to put both the girls in the bubble bath- this is Eggy! Farnee eh?

Cookie enjoying the bubbles...!

Cookie looking like she is running in the pool.

Eggy asleep peacefully with Cookie playing by herself at the background.

Cookie sticking out her tongue...; p

Leaving you

I had loved you for far too long than I should. Even after you caused me not a small amount of anguish with the nasty people that you have bred within your fold. I had been so blind to your faults because I wanted so badly to give you a chance to prove yourself true to me. But after giving you a chance for almost enough time to bring a child to this world, I feel that I have to move on in my life.

But why? Well, you continued to allow the other woman (devastatingly gorgeous but supremely evil) to try to get rid of me from the first day I arrived, you were unfaithful by giving all your time to someone else there too and totally neglecting me even though you knew that I was the one who needed the most attention for the relationship to work. You continued to allow another person to dictate the nuances of the relationship which you knew would cause a friction! It seems like you have no idea what it takes to make this work!

You allowed everyone concerned to work in silos and bred such a hostile and secretive culture. I did love you, pls never think that I did not.. in fact I loved you so much that I even neglected the new people in my life who needed me more than you did.

But I now see the light.... so I am leaving you with a heavy heart but still knowing that if I put my time and effort in this new person... it would be worth it.. becos I can bring the person to join me in the next side of heaven.

I guess you could say that I intend to be a good steward what what I had asked for.

Therefore goodbye... but never think that I was not grateful... I do thank you for being a part of my life when I needed that reassurance that I was still capable in getting your attention even though it was shortlived. Farewell...

New Pix of Twins

Since I barely have time to blog these days, i will just post some pictures of the little ones - these were taken when they were about 1-2 months only and weighing a sad 3kgs only.


Looks like they are trying to get the rose above their heads. Photo taken during their private full moon when they turned one month.


Dada trying to be funny with Eggy!


Isn't Nimbus such a giant cat!!


My 3 girls - looks like they belong to my eldest girl huh?


Crybabies!

My Only Son

These days has been hectic with feeding babies in the wee hours of the morning, once more when I wake up for work, driving around in traffic, coping with a new boss, pumping milk at work (much to the chagrin of my colleagues as the milk smells), trying to leave work on time, eating enough to take care of myself and finally trying to sleep the required 6 hours a night. As you can tell from my blog time, I have just finished a feeding session together since I am awake while everyone else in this house is sleeping!

In moments of stress in coping with the new additions in my family, I turn to my only son for comfort. He is such a constant wonder- he seems to anticipate my mood and comes to me to allow me to give him a big squeeze so that I feel much better. Somehow, hugging the cat makes me feel heck of a lot calmer esp when the babies just finished a long bout of crying.

Here are 2 updated pix of NImbus!

Reflux!

I have nicknamed my twin 1 as Cookie and Twin 2 as Eggy. Reason : Cookie makes a noise like a kookaburra and Eggy simply looks like an egg!

Eggy has been crying inconsolably for the last 2 weeks and it has wreaked havoc on my sleep pattern and my own well being (not to mention poor Eggy's too). I took note on all her behaviour and checked with my book and it all points to 'reflux'. I took her to the local paed who told me to change my milk formula to something thicker (hello.. I am breastfeeding).. then she told me to put cereal in the milk (hey bodoh! My anak is only 1.5 months old). As you can tell, I gave up on that paed.

I then took her to the paed who tended to her when she was born. He agreed that it was reflux and prescribed Losec Mups. He was writing down in his sheet "Once a day" and then Eggy threw up in my arms.... "Make that twice a day".

At first the medication worked well, Eggy was still throwing up but no longer crying like she was dying. But after one week, she started crying inconsolably again. Took her back... this time she was pumped with Zantac and also Colimix (which, btw is not supposed to be taken by infants less than 6 months.. sigh).

After the 3 drugs, she proceeded to sleep for the next 2 days.. with her body all floppy and only waking up to feed. Today is her 3rd day and I had reduced the medication to only Losec Mups and Zantac. And tomorrow I shall only feed her with Zantac. Both these medicines are acid inhibitors - meaning they reduced the production of acid in the stomach. None that really solves the problem of the weak spincter (the valve that prevents food from coming back up from the stomach).

However, the doctor says that the problem should go away in about 2 month. I hope so... cos Marido has the same problem but he is controlling it by eating Probiotics and exercising.

CONFINEment Lady

The concept of the confinement lady or confinement period is probably a weird one to my in-laws. But it's an age old one with the chinese community here in Malaysia and if I am not mistaken, other cultures like the Malays and the Indians have their own version too.

Well, I looked out for a confinement lady when I had passed the critical 3 months period. I called 3 different ones and they were all booked. I had one lady in Penang who was rather excited to take on twins but she had a bung knee and found that climbing stairs too difficult. So I did not take her. In desperation, I had one confinement lady recommend one for me. Her name was Peggy (so cool huh.. one wud think that confinement ladies are called Auntie So and So). Peggy is 62 years old but very sturdy and looks healthy.

She arrived on the day I returned from the hospital. Good thing I did not get her in earlier as i could hardly eat anything on the first day post op as the body rejected water and food. Kept on vomitting as I kept on trying to take sips of water.. bad idea!

Peggy came with bags and bags of things. She looked like she was moving house. But that was a good thing as she came very prepared. She promptly started preparing dishes for me. I had lotsa ginger (but not that much-maybe I find it ok).. but there was like 3kgs of Bentung ginger (apparently the China variety is not that nice to eat).

I have been enjoying good food... so nice to have Peggy around..it's like having a mum.. a little naggy but I feel rather pampered.. lucky me! She does not come cheap though.. but i figured that since the way I take care of my health during this period may determine my overall health later in life (this is what the Chinese believe), it's worth the money! ;)

She takes care of the babies for all their needs except their nutritional ones.. this is where she hands the babies to me each time they cry for a feed (even at night). At the moment, I am feeding on demand... hmm.. trying to see if I can set a routine but that will only happen after Peggy goes home.

Malaysia Artistes for Unity - Here in my Home

Here is where my blood was shed (when I was born) and where my twin daughters were born too.. here is to Malaysia.. and may we be colour blind!




Hold on brother hold on
The road is long. We’re on stony ground
But I’m strong. You ain’t heavy

Oh there’s a misspoken truth that lies
Colors don’t bind, oh no.
What do they know? They speak falsely.

Chorus:
Here in my home
I’ll tell you what its all about
There’s just one hope here in my heart
One Love undivided
That’s what it’s all about
Please won’t you fall in one by one by one [with me]?

Push back sister won’t you push back?
Love won’t wait. Just keep pushing on.
Yes I’m strong. You ain’t heavy.

Oh don’t you worry about that…
What we have the shadows can’t deny
Don’t you know it’s now or never?

Rap:
[Malay: TRANSLATED]
Years of fears and years of tribulation
The heart keeps searching for that endless devotion

[Chinese: TRANSLATED]
Hand in hand we’ll march like blood brothers
I speak for my people hope we’ll find peace forever

[Tamil: TRANSLATED]
May the road ahead quench my thirst for success
May the road behind echo a song of the blessed

[English]
So I will let it be known yes I feel it in my bones
No matter where I roam this is home sweet home
Sing!

Instant Weight Loss Programme

I have to admit that giving birth is such an excellent weight loss programme. I did not manage to weigh myself right after I left the hospital but after one week, when I went back, I had lost 10kgs thereabouts and 10 inches off my waistline.. yippee! So happy to see that. So altho I still look like I am six months pregnant, I am rather glad that there is no longer the heaviness of the belly when I walk.. what a huge relief!

My weight is now at 55kgs.. that is also another minor miracle. That means I only have 5 kgs to lose to reach my original weight of 50kgs.. not to hard I suppose. But at the moment, the amount of food that I am eating definitely does not allow me to lose weight. I eat many times a day.

7am - A glass of warm fresh milk/ milo
10am - A steaming bowl of noodles with ginger wine
1pm - Lunch with 3 dishes and rice
2pm- A plate of apples
2.30pm - A cup of Tang Long wine/DOM double boiled with chicken
5pm - Dessert - either Red Bean soup, corn on the cob, some kind of black bean soup etc
7.30pm - Dinner with 2-3 dishes with rice
11pm - Nesvita or some late night snack!
3am - Nesvita
All days - drinking not plain water but Red dates water.

I need to eat so much to keep up the breast feeding. So have not lost any weight but who cares... I don't...;)

Breastfeeding after Caesarean

I was worried initially that having a c-section will mean that I have a lot of difficulty breastfeeding. But my fear was unfounded. Although it was a bit more troublesome trying to breastfeed as you have to put yourself up (hence using stomach muscles - which is painful when you have had the operation) but it is still manageable if you stay in a breastfeeding friendly hospital or you have an extremely supportive husband who brings the baby to you when it is feeding time.

Also, having good pain relief helps as well. I was on morphine for 3 days post partum. That helps me to be more mobile as I don't feel as much pain as I should have if I had not had any pain relief.

However, one has to be careful that you do not carry the baby while walking during the first 10 days post operation. For my case, after 10 days, I was still in some pain and should refrain from bending at the wound area or carry heavy things. Hence, no carrying water or anything more than one liter of water.

Even after 2 weeks and 5 days, the area above and below my wound is still painful or rather tender... wonder why.. I guess being older does slow down the healing process...

Jozua And other baby

My Twin pictures

Here are some shots :

Mummy with M ia and M ikayla (from here I cannot tell who is who).

M+Ms

M kayla wide eyed - Day one

M ia sleeping- Day One