Monday, December 12, 2005

My sharpener

Tonight a dear friend told me something about a side of me that I was not aware off. It hurt of course but what good thing does not. Although I am not really sure how to deal with it but I was just glad that our friendship is important enough to her.

Told her not to give up on me. Told her to keep nudging me if she sees me slipping. Told her how much I appreciated that our friendship has climbed another level of openess and love. We had tears in our eyes whilst sitting in a hawker store with bright lights.. everyone must have thought us strange.

As iron sharpens iron, so shall friends sharpen each other.... so she is my sharpener... what an honour it is that she counts me worthy of her time to do some sharpening for.

Here's to you dear friend.. I only hope I am as good a friend to you as you are to me. I have it?

I have been wondering about the passions of my life. But do I even know what it means? Let's start at the very beginning.

The Passion is the technical term for the suffering and Agony of Jesus that led directly to the Crucifixion, his death by hanging on a cross. The origins of this meaning of the word lie in the Latin "passio" precisely to describe the travails and suffering of Jesus in this present context. All the other meanings of "passion" have been derived from this one.

It blows my mind to think that one man was passionate about something to die for it. I think about soldiers, terrorists, mothers, people in history who has done so for the love of someone or something. What tremendous power that death gives to transform the future.

I think of my one life here on earth. Of what my destiny is... of how far or not I have walked on this earth. I know that I have yet to fulfill my destiny.. cos if I had, I would not be here any longer. There it is, what is it? To find that one passion in life.. I pray for understanding and for perseverance to find it!

Monday, December 05, 2005

Who people think I am

I recently went out to dinner with one of Marido's newly found mate. David brought his wife Ani (both were in 50's). At first, Ani thought I was a Chindian (mixed Indian and Chinese)(I think it's got to do with my wearing a dress made from some sort of Indian cloth), then she got even more confused when I started speaking. She said that I had a distinct Malay accent. This is new to me. No one has ever said that I look like a Chindian nor sound like a Malay. Normally people mistake me for a Malay... esp when I am wearing the baju kurung.

Why, just last week, when I was at campus (wearing the baju kurung), 3 security guards started talking to me. At first they taught that I was Malay.. and then they looked at my ID tag and wondered aloud "Awak bukan Melayu??"

I don't think that I look particularly strange but it must be the combination of the darker skin with the clothes. Well.. that's good, I get to blend in... my next aim is to learn Tamil or Hindi. Who am I kidding... I can't even speak decent Cantonese... har har!!