This seems such a weird topic to be writing about. I wrote a piece much earlier.. maybe 2 years earlier that "perhaps the decision then to have children is not from the fact that I SHOULD or WANT to but because I CAN".... and funnily... now I can't.
So in the quest of getting a child, I spent the first month having a miscarriage, the next three months feeling weird, the subsequent 6 months wondering if my husband will be around for us to try to have a kid and in the following 4 months watching in dismay as the trickle of fresh blood appears faithfully after each month.
I wonder what is wrong? Ok..ok..maybe I am getting paranoid... it's normal to have a kid in one year... but er.. it has been one month after the normal one year... or seriously.. am I too impatient? 2 good friends assured me that I should be a little worried and should start finding out why I can't seem to conceive.
There are a few questions that I have yet to answer... and I think that it is important to do so.
1. Ovulation problems: Do I ovulate regularly? – I dunno
2. Sperm problems: Is his sperm count OK? - I dunno either
3. Fallopian tube problems: Are my tubes open? – Was this even on my radar?
The strange thing is that my gynaecologist (Dr G - a famous one in Damansara Specialist Centre) is not even worried. He just ask me to do a pap smear and a HPV test to check for cervical cancer causing virus .. and the results were fine!! He just told me to come back again next year... what a doc????
This Friday, I will go for a second opinion with Dr Fatima, a gynae in Kelana Jaya Medical Centre. Hopefully she will be able to give me some idea as to the questions above.
Well,... at least I am taking some more action.